River Ruminations on 9/9/09

This is a day signifying completion from a metaphysical perspective - and it is also symbolic of seeing the light at the other end of the tunnel...

The days are getting shorter, and it is darker in the mornings. I want to sleep in and stay in bed for a while...But I get up to meditate, and when I finish, the river beckons, and I know that if I do not visit today, it will be at least a couple of weeks before I do so again. So I don my hat - "Aligning with Grace," and hoist my kayak and healing vessel, "Grace," into my truck, and drive down to the river, seeking to align with grace once again, in body, mind, and spirit...

The river is quiet, and so densely covered with hydrilla that much of its surface, especially along the river banks is green...

I paddle upstream - up the middle which is relatively clear - enjoying a few blue herons here and there perched up floating logs and branches. I think to myself - that next week - the river my eyes will behold instead will be the Seine in Paris...Ahhh!

While I do not relish the long flight over the pond to Paris, I look forward to being in the "City of Lights" once again!

I paddle, then drift, content in the waters, giving gratitude for all that has been, and all that is, and for what is to come - as I re-visit my life as an examen of conscience. So much has been attained and experienced throughout the course of the last couple of years since I began visiting this river, even though not too long ago, I could not see or find my way to the other side. But now, I rejoice in a deep knowing, and the reunion of all that God had seemed to put asunder. Except that now I truly know and understand that nothing was of his doing. Suffering can so often be rooted in erroneous thinking. But it has its purpose. It can purify the soul in so many ways...

I shared with a gifted therapist recently - that everything seems more vibrant - the colors - the moments seem fuller and richer. I cannot fully pinpoint the moment when the shift happened - or why. But he said wisely, that God had simply decided it was enough sadness and suffering. Yes, the fruit of practice was instrumental, but it was ultimately a gift of grace...

This river has yielded so many lessons. My dialogue with it continued throughout the course of this year now nearing its close, but our relationship has now entered a different phase...There is no sense of urgency as there once was...There are no attachments - to things or to people...This river no longer shouts its lessons in my ear. And I no longer paddle upstream, working through my emotions...

Yes, I give thanks, for I read that "Gratitude is the heart's memory," a French Proverb someone "Tweeted" this afternoon...

Tonight I will celebrate my husband's birthday on an auspcious day - and we will very appropriately taste and drink a bottle of Australian shiraz by the name of: "9..."

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