The Believer

The Book, The Survivors Club, by Ben Sherwood, details incredible stories and experiences of survival on all fronts. It also describes five survivor types, and a number of survivor tools. Your report, if you take the comprehensive test online, will indicate your top three strengths that you call upon most commonly in survival experiences.

I have still not taken the time to take the online test, but wish to share a description of The Believer...

Sherwood, in the interview I heard on NPR, asked a top military expert trained in survival skills what he deemed the most important trait to survive. The person, whose name escapes me at the moment, stated without hesitation, that it was faith. Faith also happens to be one of the survival tools.

"When you are a Believer, you put your faith in God to protect and sustain you through your trials. Your beliefs and convictions are like life preservers keeping you above water in difficult times. You trust deeply that God has a plan for your life and will steer you through adversity. You're convinced that God will never give you a challenge you couldn't handle...

Even in the worst times, you feel blessed and are confident things always work out for the best...

You draw remarkable emotional and physical power from your faith...You're able to banish negative feelings or flip them around into positive thoughts...

You are strengthened and emboldened by your faith and comforted by the conviction that your fortunes will improve one way or another this earth or in the next life. Above all, you're a Believer..."

More to follow...

Being a Connector

I began the morning by trekking over to McDonald's for my "senior" coffee and breakfast burrito, and a nice chat with the wonderful woman who serves me, and whose presence touches my soul very deeply...The experience reminds me that I am a "connector..." This will make more sense shortly...

Then I went to the river for a quick visit. I was alone there, and I made my way carefully to the little cliff where I descend to the rocks, but could not make it down. The sleet we had on top of the snow this week made everything very slippery, and I was not very bright in going out in my crocks.

I noticed someone had walked on the ice because there were tracks everywhere. I wanted to go down to the rocks because a couple of beer bottles had been abandoned there, but I knew it would be precarious to do so. As I contemplated what to do, a squirrel approached me, stood on its hind legs, and held out it paws like it wanted me to give it something. An acorn perhaps? Then he left. I decided to walk down to the rocks by way of the boat launch, though it was still blocked off with orange cones. I didn't get far because I slid and fell on the ice trying to get around to the launch area. That was my sign to go no further...

Yesterday, on my way to my noon yoga class, I heard Ben Sherwood interviewed on the Diane Rehm show on NPR. He has just published The Survivor's Club: The Secrets and Science that Could Save Your Life. I found the discussion fascinating. So much so - that I went out to buy the book later in the afternoon.

The author tried to figure out why some people survive challenging situations better than others. What he found is - we all have different approaches in how we deal with loss, tragedy, life-threatening situations, and so forth. As a result, we fall into certain categories or types:

The Fighter
The Believer
The Connector
The Thinker
The Realist

If you follow the right hand column of this blog and scroll down, you can take a simple test to ascertain your type. However, if you buy the book, you are given a ten digit code that allows you take a comprehensive test online, generating a detailed report with some additional information, such as which survivor characteristics will affect or complement your type.

As I listened to the interview on the radio, and then read portions of the book last night, I received a lot of insight into my type, and into the experiences I have had in the last couple of years. I have not taken the online test yet - but I know that I am a Connector from the short test and I also know that I am a Believer.

Here is an excerpt from the book about Connectors:

"When you're a Connector, you overcome incredible adversity with the power of your relationships and bonds with other people. You are deeply devoted to your family and friends. Your love...motivates you to tack enormous obstacles...

You hold your relationships sacred, and you will go to any length to protect and preserve them. You draw strength from these primary relationships and often rely on support groups or social networks to help you through difficult times...

You often feel empathy for those who are struggling...You're good at reading strangers and situations...You survive because of your powerful bonds. You would endure anything - and do everything - for the people you love..."

Sherwood pointed out that the experience of isolation can be just as detrimental to our health as heart disease or high cholesterol. For a connector, isolation would be devastating.

One of the incredible stories he told, was of a woman who fell on her knitting needle and pierced her heart. Though her friends wanted to pull it out, she said no. And she waited for the paramedics rather than being driven to the hospital. Those two instincts, saved her life. As a result of the surgery to remove the broken needle, her breast cancer was discovered. She considered herself the luckiest woman because the cancer might not have been discovered until much later. In addition, she noted that every time she had to go to the hospital for a test or to the doctor's for an appointment, someone always accompanied her...

I will share more on this topic tomorrow...

Endings and Beginnings II

On January 18th, my entry was titled, "Endings and Beginnings," and I wrote about a seed of some sort that I had received, with a beautiful inscription:

"Every ending, holds a new beginning."

Yesterday, as I was clearing out a mound of paperwork, I found in the envelop in which the seed had arrived, this wonderful explanation, which I had somehow not seen or noticed, and I wish to share it here. This message - of endings and beginnings - is one that I have received again and again of late - and was most recently given to me by a Vedic astrologer, who affirmed that I was exactly where I needed to be - and should focus on deepening my spirituality and paying attention to my health...Humm....

It turns out this beautiful seed that now sits on my desk where I can see and touch it ever day - is a Sea-bean...

"Sea-beans come from trees and vines that grow along tropical shores and rain forests all over the world. The seeds or fruits fall from their parent plant into waterways, such as the Amazon River, then drift through inlets to reach the ocean. They travel with ocean currents until they wash up on a beach somewhere, perhaps thousands of lines from their origin.

Sea-beans are quite hard and buoyant, which helps them survive their long-distance voyage. For hundreds of years they have been seen as a symbols of good luck, longevity, endurance, and fertility. Some of it is due to their ability to float ocean currents for years and even decades before coming to rest on foreign shores (often with their powers of germination unimpeded). Other reasons may be due to their relative rareness on many beaches north of the Tropics.

Entada seeds are revered world wide as good luck charms and have been for centuries."

There are so many messages for me in this wonderful description. And this seed particularly reminds me of my river journey and experiences...

I have missed being in the river. Tomorrow it will be a month since I last went into its healing waters - and I have no idea when I may be able to go back inside. I miss the embrace of the river, the company of the herons and the bass, the music of the birds, and the opportunity to ground so deeply with nature. In many ways, I feel lost at sea - traveling like this bean - bouncing here and there against foreign shores - but not yet landing on the riverbank where I will settle, germinate, and bear fruit...

But my soul also knows, that the journey itself is what is most important - not the destination. As I flow up or down the river, as this seed - or within the protection and embrace of Grace, my beautiful kayak - I know that every experience and living creature that I encounter - on land and water - contributes to the germination of my own soul - so that I am constantly bearing fruit, in ways that are seen and unseen, and not always appreciated...

This beautiful seed - this bean - is a rich metaphor for my journey, and it conjures up layers upon layers of rich insights, and of moments and experiences of deep blessings received...

Thank you again Erin, for such a thoughtful, wonderful, simple, and meaningful gift! I will treasure it always!

Snow Day Inspirations

I received both of these inspirational pieces in the last couple of days from two different friends. The first one was embedded in the sermon given at the National Cathedral, at the Prayer Service for President Obama, the day after the Inauguration.

Both of them warmed my heart and conveyed the exact message I needed to hear in each moment that it was received...

The Wolf Story

There is a story attributed to Cherokee wisdom:
One evening a grandfather was teaching his young grandson about the internal battle that each person faces.

"There are two wolves struggling inside each of us," the old man said.

"One wolf is vengefulness, anger, resentment, self-pity, fear...
The other wolf is compassion, faithfulness, hope, truth, love..."

The grandson sat, thinking, then asked:

"Which wolf wins, Grandfather?"

His grandfather replied,

"The one you feed."


I Wish You Enough
by Bob Perks

I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.
I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.
I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.
I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys
will appear that much bigger.
I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.
I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.
I wish you enough "Hellos," to get through the "Final Goodbye."

The River, Falling Snow, and Musings

I awaken to a gently falling snow for the first time in over a year...

I sit in meditation for an hour and hear the words over and over whispered in my heart:

"For God alone suffices..."

I repeat it like a sacred mantra and I know it is true, even if sometimes I cannot see clearly through the myriad of sometimes conflicting quotidian experiences that life continually offers and presents...

I drive out to the river to visit it, in this, the first true snow fall, and it is quiet and still...

I come upon a squirrel joyously scampering across the slippery road and I nearly slide off it, as I try to avoid hitting the squirrel, and I realize that it is the first one I have seen in a long time...

The boat launch area has been blocked off with orange cones. The river itself is halfway frozen - an imaginary line longitudinally bisecting the river. Half of it consists of frozen ice, cracked here and there, slabs of ice precariously perched on other slabs, as a result of heat expansion. The other half, towards the Maryland riverbank, is thawed and looks cold...

It is silent here, the soft snow, gently falling, as I carefully make my way down towards the rocks. I feel the ground shifting beneath me, the falling snow sliding off a layer of ice, and I hear one lone bird singing very sweetly...

I survey a river that is as different as I have ever seen it - partially frozen, and empty, and yet so full of promise and possibilities at the same time...

I reflect on the Reiki Precepts which I have not recited in a while, thinking of all the fear that is weighing heavily on this land and its people - recalling a therapist's suggestion to be vigilant about the manifestation of fear in regards to money at this time...

I feel lost at a time I have given and released so much, that sometimes it clouds my ability to see what I have gained...

I think back to the precepts that very authoritatively remind me to let go of fear and worrying, for they are merely illusions which distract me from pursuing my spiritual path and true purpose...I must always be true to who I am - regardless of the immediate outcome, for the sake of my reason for being and the work that I am here to do...

I know that compassion towards myself and others is the only genuine path that I must follow. And for a brief moment, I recall a scene in the somewhat campy and dated, but extremely inspiring movie from the seventies, "Brother Sun, Sister Moon." This movie by Franco Zeffirelli, about the life of St. Francis of Assisi, was the catalyst for a profound mystical experience...

I walk away from the river, remembering the scene where St. Clare of Assisi exclaims with exuberant passion:

"And where there is sadness, please - let me always find joy."

I drive home once again to shovel, and pray that in the midst of all the sadness and loss experienced globally, and personally - that I may always find, express, and celebrate an explosion of joy - as I exhorted my students to do...

I Will Just Say This

I re-visited the theme of joy in my classes this morning, inviting my students to create a bigger container to receive and express joy - and to embody an explosion of joy in their practice...

I recall my therapist friend affirming that we need to experience joy in our lives and must elicit its memory and experience as much as we can - even when it seems absent...

I review the poems of St. Teresa of Avila and find this one, and wish to share it, because it reminds me of hope, which somehow lays the groundwork for joy...

I Will Just Say This

We
bloomed in Spring.

Our bodies
are the leaves of God.

The apparent seasons of life and death
our eyes can suffer;

but our souls, dear, I will just say this forthright:
they are God
Himself,

we will never
perish
unless He
does...

There is always room for hope...for of that hope, is born the experience of joy, because we are never far from the Divine and cannot truly be - any less than God is...

How can it be any other way? For we are made in the image and likeness of God...

Let Nothing Disturb You

After yesterday's posting, I decided to look up some of the prayers and sayings of St. Teresa of Avila, a prolific writer, and the only woman accorded the recognition of being a Doctor of the Church. She is also sometimes referred to as the Doctor of Prayer, since she wrote so much on the subject.

Teresa is a complex figure, who lived in the 16th century in Spain, and her writings are not always accessible. She is perhaps best known for her work, the Interior Castle, in which she describes the various stages of the spiritual life by comparing them to various rooms in a manor one must go through in other to enter the most interior realm...

"Let nothing disturb you,
let nothing frighten you,
all things pass away:
God never changes.
Patience obtains all things.
He who has God
finds he lacks nothing;
God alone suffices."

"Christ has no body now but yours
No hands, no feet on earth but yours
Yours are the eyes through which he looks
with compassion on this world
Christ has no body on earth now but yours."

"Lord, grant that I may always allow myself
to follow your plans,
and perfectly accomplish your will.

Grant that in all things,
great and small,
today and all the days of my life
I may do whatever you require of me.
Help me respond to the slightest prompting
of Your Grace, so that I may be
Your Trustworthy instrument for Your honor.

May Your Will be done
in time and eternity -
by me, in me, and through me..."

"May today there be peace within.
May you trust God and know
that you are exactly where you are meant to be.
May you not forget the infinite possibilities
that are born of faith.
May you use those gifts that you have received
and pass on the love that has been given to you...
May you be content knowing
you are a child of God.
Let this presence settle into your bones,
and allow your soul the freedom
to sing, dance, praise and love.
It is there for each and every one of us."

May these prayers bring the comfort to your heart that they have brought to mine. I have received the most adequate message for this day...

How Can I Serve?

For the past few days, I have been editing a manuscript of guided meditations I wrote somewhere between 15 and 18 years ago. I have re-titled the collection In the Shadow of the Divine: Meditating with Masters and Mystics.

The meditations are my impressions and interpretations of the writings and teachings of Meister Eckhart, Julian of Norwich, Hildegard of Bingen, Francis of Assisi, Francis de Sales, and others.

I am finding that this manuscript is speaking to me in a much deeper way, and it seems the messages imparted and received are precisely the ones I need to hear at this moment.

All of these mystics lived their lives in service in one way or another. I thought of that, as I reflected on the following quotes from the Inner Journey Newsletter, which spoke to me, as they often seem to do. They address this very notion of service and its role...

"God has no other hands but ours."
- Dorothee Solle
(Note: While this is attributed to Solle,
St. Teresa of Avila wrote a prayer with this very sentence.)

"One act of beneficence,
one act of real usefulness,
is worth all the abstract sentiment
in the world."
- Ann Radcliffe

"To learn to get along without,
to realize that what the world
is going to demand of us
may be a good deal more important
than what we are entitled
to demand of it -
this is a hard lesson."
- Bruce Catton

"Past the seeker as he prayed
came the crippled and the beggar
and the beaten.
And seeing them he cried:
'Great God, how is it
that a loving Creator can see such things
And yet do nothing about them?'
God said, 'I did something.
I made you.'"
- Sufi Teaching

Finding Joy

Yesterday I had the opportunity to spend time with a gifted therapist and healer and long time meditator, and he spoke to me of the need to feel joy in our lives, even when it is hard to do so.

Paramahansa Yogananda in his writings, often described experiencing the presence of God as ever new bliss and joy. On a couple of occasions, I have written about how the ancient Egyptians believed that one's capacity for experiencing joy determined one's suitability for the afterlife. Those hoping to cross over were simply asked: "Did you find joy? And, did you bring joy?"

But how can we call forth joy if it is absent or eludes us? These are certainly trying times for many...

This gifted therapist suggested that we meditate, and recall a moment or instance when we experienced deep joy and love in our lives - perhaps in a meaningful relationship - or some other occasion - and then suggested transferring this feeling directly to the Divine in meditation. Over time, our deepening connection with the Divine in meditation would lead to experiencing more joy in our lives and less loneliness or other feelings of disconnection and isolation. It seemed to me, that this would be a wonderful practice to undertake, and might be useful for any of us experiencing a lot of loss, particularly in our current economic climate...

The experience of joy comes in many forms. Certainly it is evident in our significant relationships - but joy is often hidden in the little and most unexpected experiences we have on a daily basis, that might easily be overlooked. Joy can be identified and felt in someone's unexpected embrace, a show of support, in a brief exchange, in one act of kindness or thoughtfulness. It could come in so many other ways as well...

I thought of this earlier in the day, when I reviewed some of the experiences I had yesterday. I received an email and a card in the mail from two people thanking me for the gift of one of my poetry books...

I also had the opportunity to meet with my gifted therapist friend in the morning, and in the afternoon I was able to ride over to yoga class with a yogini friend and share from the heart and exchange support for each other. I am both grateful and joyous for those experiences.

I attended a wonderful yoga class that fed my soul on so many levels - and was so joyful and lighthearted, and following that, I was able to observe another class, taught by an incredibly gifted and witty Anusara Yoga colleague - Joe Miller. His knowledge of anatomy and ability to link it directly to the Anusara Yoga Universal Principles of Alignment was nothing short of breath-taking and inspiring. I was amazed at his command of so much information that flowed so effortlessly in his instructions.

Joe taught to a packed house and was able to convey a lot of information that was esoteric in a way that was both cogent and accessible to all. I loved some of the languaging he used and took copious notes for myself. I also loved some little gems he shared along the way such as:

"Yoga is the art of moving from your center."

"VIra is courage - and implies moving into new actions and new attitudes. Yoga enables us to connect into the amazing intelligence of the body."

"When we open to grace - we create a compassionate space."

I had not planned on being able to observe Joe, so I ended my day with an unexpected joy - to witness a dedicated teacher, practitioner, and skilled and compassionate body-worker - son of a master teacher - give a multitude of awaiting hearts the gift of yoga.

What can be any more joyous than that?

Reflections and Quotations

Today is looking like a very long and busy day, so I will leave you on this early morning with a few quotes I came across recently, to reflect on. The first part of these was sent to me by a friend...

"When we're through with this earth
and all these problems,
we don't have to come back.
But as long as we're here
we have a job to do
and a purpose to fulfill
and that means dealing with
the circumstances around us."
- Rolling Thunder, Cherokee

"We are put on the earth to participate in life. We have a beautiful mind, we have the ability to pray, we have the ability to change, we have the ability to accept, and we have choices. All things God created are constantly changing. This constant change causes our circumstances to change. Sometimes we say life is difficult. During these time we need to use our tools: the tools of prayer, and the tools of meditation. We are designed to change and live joyfully on this earth. The only requirement for living joyfully is to live according to the laws, principles and values given to us by the Creator...

Great Spirit,
give me Your courage today
and guide my footsteps."

* * * * *

"Our deepest need
is for the joy that comes
with loving and being loved,
with knowing we are
of genuine use to others."
- Ekanath Easwaren

"We are able to be of service
to those who suffer
only to the extent
that we have been able to transform
fear in our own lives."
- Robert Sardello

Contemplating Unity at the River

I go down to the river very briefly, because it is just too cold to stay there very long...I am amazed that the river is totally frozen over - it is a wide sheet of white - and even the rocks are under the ice! I tread carefully around the edge of the riverbanks listening to the ice crack here and there underneath the pressure of my steps.

I survey the broad expanse before me and it seems to me that the very waves of the river were frozen in the flash of one moment - so that it looks both active and still at the same time - almost like a meditation in motion...

I wonder about the fish and the turtles - and where they might be and what they do in this kind of weather...

I contemplate unity and recall how I told my students today, that we are truly all one, and that our practice and chanting serve as reminders of this reality. And yet at times, I really feel so far away from being able to embody this unity personally - there seem to be so many moments when experiences of distance and separation take up residence within and become more of the norm. I reflect on insights and quotes from a recent Inner Journey Newsletter which focused on contemplating unity:

"Poverty is in separatism. Abundance is in unity."
- Torkom Saraydarian

"Watch for those times when you perceive yourself to be separate from the rest of the world. When you find yourself feeling uncomfortable, threatened or isolated, remember Neale Donald Walsch's words: 'There's only one of us in this room.'

When we perceive differences in thinking and behaving, we might remember that these are merely different expressions of the one universal life force. We can release judgment as to whether those differences are right or wrong or good or bad. We can drop the labels that divide the world into pieces, and simply appreciate the rich variety of ways that energy can manifest as form."

"If we are to achieve a rich culture, rich in contrasting values, we must recognize the whole gamut of human potentialities, and so weave a less arbitrary social fabric, one in which each diverse human gift will find a fitting place."
- Margaret Mead

On This Historic Day

On this historic day, I think of the parameters of my life span - beginning in November 1955 - to this present moment...

I was born two weeks before Rosa sat down on that bus, so that Martin could march, so that Barack could run - so that our children could fly on the wings of their dreams...

I still vividly remember my son in kindergarten, visibly irate after hearing the story of Rosa Parks, demanding to know what I had done to correct the injustice of that situation. I had to remind him that I was only a two week old infant, living in London, England at the time, and totally incapable of taking any action...

On this historic day, I witness a sea of humanity who have come from far and wide - and from every background and ethnic and racial origin - to see the swearing in of a new President, who clearly ushers in a new era....

On this historic day, which is also my 28th wedding anniversary, I watch events unfold before me I only dared to dream, as I contemplate drinking an '81 bordeaux to celebrate two occasions...

On this historic day, I give thanks for all that has made this day possible, and for the shift in consciousness that is tangible, palpable, and undeniable and for the Divine Presence that permeates all of it!

Blooming Where You are Planted

I concluded a wonderful weekend workshop yesterday, with Betsey Downing, an Anusara Yoga senior certified teacher. The theme of her second class was "bloom where you are planted," and we did this by calling forth and embodying our best, and most authentic self.

Throughout the course of the weekend, Betsey shared many gems and insights, not only in terms of our practice of asana, but in regards to how to live our lives as well. It was a weekend that brought together many certified, and inspired Anusara instructors, and even many more students. The sessions were filled to capacity, and the kula, or community there present - helped each another into poses and assists.

Betsey acknowledged the reality of something that I have felt for a long time - that is - the incredible gift that Willow Street Yoga provides in the quality of its instruction and the community that exists there. It is something that every visiting Anusara yoga teacher notes. I am fortunate to study there myself. What makes Willow Street Yoga unique is that it is the only studio in the world that has about 13 certified teachers and a few more in the pipeline. All of its instructors are actively engaged in on-going study. I frequently see the teachers - from the director on down - taking each other's classes.

I always tell my students not to study with someone who is not engaged in taking classes or regularly attending workshops or trainings or some sort. As someone who was an educator for two and half decades, I regularly witnessed teachers who felt they knew all there was to know about their discipline and would not engage in further study or self-improvement. This of course, affects the quality of the instruction imparted.

I wish to share some of the insights that came from Betsey this weekend...

"Argue with reality - and you're wrong 100% of the time. If you engage in this practice - it dis-empowers you.

You always need to make the best out of a situation for it will shift your energy, and ultimately, everything is about energy...

We are not always aware of how beautiful we are...

Meditation gives you the chance to look at yourself without judgment and just accept yourself. Yoga reveals the thorns in our lives - and enables us to remove them so that we can truly reveal our light. Don't get so identified with the cloakings in your life...

When you meditate, use this simple mantra if you have none as you breathe in and out: 'Namaha,' that is 'I honor and embrace everything that comes to me as a manifestation of Divine Consciousness.'

Always strive to become your highest self - define yourself in the highest way that you can - in compassionate and joyful awareness. Today - make a commitment to see yurself in the highest way that you can...

Accept what you did today - and honor yourself for trying. The sequence deliberately included a couple of poses that were not accessible to most to stretch your understanding. Know, that whatever you could not do - you were not supposed to do..."

And I would add, there is a time for everything, and a lesson in every experience as well...

Endings and Beginnings

I awaken very early, in anticipation of the conclusion of a wonderful weekend workshop. I sit in meditation for a while, and would love to have more time to share insights from yesterday, but it will have to wait...Maybe I'll find some time later, or maybe I'll write tomorrow...

I come home late last night after a full day of practice - buoyed by sharing and conversation - and dinner with some some wonderful yoginis and master teachers - some of the best of the Anusara kula - and waiting for me was an incredible gift I almost didn't see before going up to bed...

I open an envelope and find a beautiful seed of some sort that has been painted and decorated in purple. In the center is a beautiful angel - or goddess with arms crossed and flowing hair, surrounded by this inscription:

"Every ending, holds a new beginning."

It resonates so deeply within...At a pivotal point in my life - on the threshold of so many changes and during the weekend of a major decision and shift - I receive this message - as an affirmation of the support of the Universe, and friends, and the Divine - and as comfort as well.

Thank you Erin! I have placed your gift where I will see and touch it every day, in my Sanctuary of sanctuaries - in my Holy of Holies - where I meditate, and pray, and practice, and write - every day!

Namaste!

Saying Yes to Life Without Complaints

When I attend a workshop, I normally take copious notes. But last night, I simply enjoyed the sequencing and pacing of the Anusara Yoga workshop with Betsey Downing, who is often referred to as the "Grand Dame" of yoga.

Betsey was one of my first teachers when I started taking yoga way back in the summer of '95. I completed the first of many teacher trainings under her - and she was the first one to "hire" me as a yoga teacher back in '97.

I have thoroughly enjoyed witnessing her exquisite evolution as a teacher. It has been a joy to behold how much more deeply she communicates her personal spiritual journey and the reality of universal spiritual truths. Like a fine wine, she gets better with age!

Last night, she began her weekend workshop, entitled, "Living with Virtuosity," by exhorting us to say yes more fully to life by adhering to a complaint-free existence. I swore the theme had been especially chosen for me!

Betsey shared insights from a book she was reading, titled, A Complaint-Free World, that began as an exercise. Those willing to practice dis-engaging from complaints, don a purple wrist band, and switch it to their opposite wrist every time they complain. The purpose is to go 21 days without complaining. If you do complain, then you have to start all over, until you go for 21 full days without a complaint!

Betsey told us, that it takes the average person 5 to 7 months to go complaint-free! She explained that, "you focus your attention on what you want to do - and what you do, grows," rather than focusing on negative thoughts.

"Happiness - is not what happens to us - but is a result of what we choose to focus our thoughts on. Negative thoughts can be toxic to our system."

Betsey reminded us that much of our negative thinking in yoga centered around our bodies and what we could do or not do, especially as we grew older or sustained injuries. I loved seeing her work compassionately with the group, encouraging all present to accept where they were, and yet also bringing out the best in each and everyone.

I look forward to the rest of the weekend!

For more information on Betsey, visit her site:
www.betseydowning.com

The River is Frozen and Yoga Ruminations

I am not sure when I visited the river last. This morning the temperature registered 12 degrees F - which for this area - is pretty darn cold! I decided to pay it a brief visit.

I began the morning as I do often on Fridays, by going to McDonald's. Yes - I know some of you will be appalled. But I love their breakfast burrito for a buck, and their coffee. But mostly, I go - because there is a beautiful, middle aged woman who always waits on me. I cannot quite place her accent - I think she might be from the Middle East - but she has the most wonderful smile, disposition, and generosity of spirit. She always gives me my coffee at the "senior citizen" rate, which makes it extra special.

This morning we bantered about the weather, and how cold it was. The next moment, she had taken my hands in hers, and lovingly rubbed them to make them warm again! We just never know where we will meet an angel! I wonder how many people she has touched, by just being present and smiling to them. I look forward to getting to know her better in the future...

I thought of this, and several other things when I visited the river briefly this morning. The whole launch area was iced over, as were the rocks. I actually stepped onto the edge of the ice along the riverbank - I know - not smart - and I cracked the ice and got my foot wet. Then I walked along the launch area, gingerly stepping on the ice here and there, listening to parts of it crack as the sun shone down on it...

After breakfast, but before visiting the river, I went to the studio to handle the new registrations. I talked to my friend AJ, who teaches the Friday morning class for a bit. She was tired, and asked if she could have a sip of my coffee. Instead I told her to take it. I could tell she needed my "senior" coffee more than I did this morning...She lit up like a bright star and was all smiles! I sure got a lot of mileage out of all the love that coffee generated this morning!

At the river, I pondered the experiences we have and the gifts we receive - from so many sources, often unexpected...

Yesterday, I drove out to the other side of the river to take my new yoga class. For the first time in three years, I was going to a new class with a new teacher. It truly felt like the first day of school!

Suzie Hurley is the owner and director of Willow Street Yoga Center, and my new teacher. She began by setting an overall theme for the session, and one for the class as well. She spoke of making a promise to ourselves, as opposed to making a resolution. She shared insights she had gleaned by a wonderful newsletter by Noah Maze, an Anusara Yoga Certified Teacher.

The theme for the class was: "Yes, we can!" This mantra, repeated by President-Elect Obama, was invoked several times as she led us through a wonderful sequence of poses, so very well paced, and was just what the doctor ordered! I left her class infected by her joy, openness, acceptance, and enthusiasm. I know she will play an exquisite role in this next phase of my journey.

I conclude this entry with some excerpts from Noah's newsletter:

"I love how transitions - the setting of 2008 or the dawn of 2009 - offer natural pauses for reflection. These are opportunities to envision the future, and recommit powerfully to the present...

A promise draws us into the experience of the three dimensions of time, AND presents the possibility of the timeless...One wouldn't make a promise that wasn't rooted in good reason, and in the past. A promise exists in the present. It is only as good as it is kept. And a promise exists in the future, because you would not make a promise if it did not have promise. Thus, a promise draws us into the fullness of our being; into the past, into the present, into the future, ALL at the same time - into timelessness.

Yoga is the promise you make to yourself. You go to the yoga mat because of all the things you have ever been, and the experiences that shape who you are and who you want to become. You come to the mat every day to keep your promise to yoga, and in keeping that promise, you infuse the future with hope...You have whatever you need for your own fulfillment. Whatever you have (even the unpleasant baggage and issues) you need. At least for now. But as years change, needs change. Yoga, then, is cultivating and optimizing what you have been given - figuring out how to optimize what's good - get rid of the things you can be lighter without. And so grows inner sweetness (madhurya), intoxication (saumya), and beauty (saundarya).

Yoga is the promise we make to each other. 'You have my back, I have yours.' We are in this together...This demands that we bring our individual transformation back into something we can share...Who will you align with and why?

Always, the universe will give you what you ask for. So seek the highest, in every moment. Sometimes change happens in leaps and bounds, but most of the time, it is a step-by-step process of cultivation and growth..."

For information on Noah Maze, visit:
www.noahmazeyoga.com
And for information on Willow Street Yoga Center:
www.willowstreetyoga.com

Contentment - Santosha

The word for contentment in Sanskrit is "santosha," and it is a quality all yogis and yoginis are supposed to cultivate. It is one of the "niyamas" - that the sage Patanjali speaks of in the Yoga Sutras.

Nischala Joy Devi, in her book, The Secret Power of Yoga, deviates from the common understanding of the yamas and niyamas as the "do's" and "don'ts" of yoga. Instead, she describes the expression of the yamas, as the reflection of our true nature, and the cultivation of the niyamas, as our evolution towards harmony.

For example, one of the yamas, "ahimsa," is often translated as non-violence. Devi, takes a more positive approach, born of the expression of consciousness in the heart instead of the head, and describes the more positive attributes implied in ahimsa - namely - the cultivation of reverence, love, and compassion for all.

Similarly, "asteya", is interpreted as generosity, and honesty, rather than non-stealing.

This is how she explains santosha as a quality or virtue to be espoused:

"When at peace and content with oneself and others
(Santosha), supreme joy is celebrated."

By the cultivation of this virtue, we are inwardly purified.

Here are some insights and quotes from The Inner Journey Newsletter:

"When the sun rises, I go to work. When the sun goes down, I take my rest. I dig the well from which I drink. I farm the soil which yields my food. I share creation. Kings can do no more."
- Chinese Proverb

Do you sense the peace and contentment that can come from an appreciation of one's place in the cosmos?

How do we get there with the complexities and pressures of our current lifestyles? Perhaps it is a matter of becoming aware of what we truly have as opposed to what our egos believe we need. If we look closely, we may find that our ego 'needs' are just desires.

When you find yourself longing for something, stop and ask, "What is missing from my life? Is it a need? What are the essential qualities of what I seek? How can I experience that now?"

"If we have not quiet in our minds, outward comfort will do no more for us than a golden slipper on a gouty foot."
- John Bunyan

"Try to be like the turtle - at ease in your own shell."
- Bill Copeland

The Art of Self-Care

Recently I came across a review of the book, The Art of Extreme Self-Care, by Cheryl Richardson. One of my favorite books by her, is The Unmistakable Touch of Grace. Here are some suggestions she makes for taking care of ourselves:

"When hit with an unexpected life challenge, most of us revert back to the old coping strategies that kept us safe as kids. For example, you may have taken refuge in your bedroom when you parents fought. Then, as an adult, when faced with a chaotic situation, you find yourself isolating from others to escape the stress. You don't ask for help. You don't reach out for emotional support...you suffer in silence...

These are challenging times and we all need Extreme Self-Care more than ever. So, that being said, I'd like to leave you with a few thoughts for the New Year:

• You can't live an authentic, soul-directed life without disappointing people, hurting their feelings, or making them angry. That's the truth.
• You deserve to ask for and receive the support you need - but first you must resign as General Manager of the Universe.
• It's time to stop swallowing your anger and instead, step up and take a stand for yourself in the face of inappropriate behavior.
• In order to live a rich and meaningful life you'll need to honor and protect your sensitivity. The days of 'sucking it up' or 'developing tough skin' are over."

Certainly interesting things to consider and contemplate in the New Year when we are faced with trying situations.

Self-Reflection and the Heart

The New Year and the season always seem to invite deep reflection. Certainly, the state of the economy, and world affairs are also inviting more introspection on our parts. Many of us are re-evaluating our priorities and values and making changes in our lives as as a result of our reflection, and/or economic factors and realities...

We are invited to consider what is truly important, and what is the purpose of our lives during these trying times in the deep of winter...

I received Jamie Allison's newsletter recently. Jamie is a senior Certified Anusara Yoga teacher, and she recently established a beautiful retreat center in Colorado. I'd like to share some of her insights here:

"The natural world, in all its magnificence, does not have the capacity for self-reflection or self-knowing. We, as humans, do. A human birth is a rare and blessed gift. Unlike the deer walking the same path in the snow, we can deviate from our chosen path and branch out into something new at any moment. Just like the deer we can get in a rut that feels safe and seems to serve us and not notice that we can be doing and offering more.

As you look out on the fresh, untracked snow of this coming new year, what path will best serve you and others? Where do you want to offer your efforts? What truly interests you and how do you want to invest in your sacred opportunity of life?

One way to find clarity is to make the time to settle and listen. What is your heart's desire? Can you be still enough to hear the soft voice of your heart inviting you into the fullness of your life? What inspires you? What tugs at your heart? Noticing those things, great and small, that give you the greatest joy and the least stress, just might be one way to truly follow your heart. Attuning to the guiding light of the heart gives clarity as we navigate the options that life presents to us. The beacon of the heart is our Inner North Star. Let it be your guiding light through out this coming New Year and see where it leads you. May you be surprised and delighted!

Wishing you a journey that is sweet, filled with adventure and one that takes you into the wonder of your Self."

For more information on Jamie Allison, visit her web site:
www.omzoneyoga.com

For God Alone - Suffering

This is my last entry on the book, For God Alone: The Life and Letters of a Saint, about the life and writings of Sri Gyanamata. I have shared so many passages because they spoke to me - and hopefully have spoken to some of you.

An English teacher once said to me: "We write, in order to know." So I transcribe these excerpts and passages to deepen my understanding of what is meant by them.

I would also add that, "we teach, in order to learn..." By sharing the wisdom of this remarkable woman, I hope to embody the insights that were fruit of her practice, in a way that brings greater clarity into my life.

And so, for one last time, I share these insights and paragraphs from Chapter 12, "Suffering Can Be a Pathway to Greatness:"

"It is said that one never knows his or her spiritual strength until faced with adversity. Through her trials - physical, mental, and spiritual - Gyanamata developed heroic perseverance, endurance, and unconquerable attitude; she found that these tests strengthened her character as nothing else could have. In the letters that follow, Gyanamata shows others how to cultivate that same positive spirit and healthy spiritual perspective by which they also could come to experience that 'suffering can be a pathway to greatness.'"

"Do not make the mistake of holding on to your condition by mourning over it. Stress the points in which you have gained. Remember that part of the cure lies in forgetting the illness. We have to affirm health when we do not feel it."

"I have come to measure spiritual advancement, not alone by the light that surrounds one when he meditates or by the visions he has of saints, but by what he is able to endure in the hard, cold light of day. Christ's greatness was not only that he could go into meditation and gloriously realize his oneness with the Father...but also that he could endure."

"All the devotion, wisdom, and faith that you have acquired are being now tested by God. You must now use all your spiritual acquirements to pass the test of God. Keep your wisdom-light ever burning during the darkness of this test. And this is what I pray for you, that you ever remember and love Him and forget the body."

"If one can delight in God only when he comes as joy, what is he? But suppose God comes only as pain? That it takes a spiritual hero to endure. If, in the darkness, the mind never wavers, if love and longing never grow weak, it is then that you prove to yourself that you really have the love of God."

"A Voice spoke to me. It was not my own voice. I was not talking to myself...It was clear and distinct and separate. It said: 'Endure what I shall send. That will be enough.'"

"After all that has been said, deeply I feel that I am being watched over and loved and the Plan is being worked out for my growth...There has been no failing of Divinity."

"To your question as to why we must suffer, I would answer that we are on the wheel of life. As it turns, we are hurt; and it is the part of our mind...that responds with pain that indicates the shortcomings that God wants us to rise above."

"What suffers...? The answer is obvious - that which must die if ever we are to reach the Goal..."

"What really matters can be put in a few words: complete surrender to God, to the Divine Will. If we did that perfectly, what else would we need to do? What else would we need to know? Doing, knowing, in one divine act, we would find Him on any plane, and would enter into Peace - for 'Thou has made us for Thyself, and our hearts are restless until they rest in Thee.'"

For God Alone - More and Better

Sri Gyananmata on quietly practicing the presence of God within:

"It can always be deeper."

"There is a mistake that we all need to guard against. A few days of happiness, of bliss, do not mean that the fight is over; it has to be waged again and again and again against our only real enemy, the self."

"The years pass in review before me, and leave me with two thoughts: The work performed by me - it could have been so much better done. My devotion to God and Guruji - it could have been so much deeper. The flame burning in my heart could have burned so much higher, have been so much brighter, so much more intense, if my only constant prayer had been: 'Change me.'"

To Paramahansa Yogananda:

"I have found a beautiful way to direct the mind to God. It is your poem, 'God! God! God!' Just the repetition of the Holy Name. How simple, and just suited to my present state."

Tomorrow, one last entry...

For God Alone - Renunciation

From Chapter 7, "Renunciation," from For God Alone...

"Having actively sought God for years before entering the ashram, Gyanamata was well aware that the essential aspect of renunciation - for the householder as well as for the monastic - is inner surrender of earthly attachments, and the cultivation of the one desire to seek God and follow His will.

To all who sought her counsel, regardless of their outer role in life, she recommended the inner renunciation of lesser desires and the practice of the yoga meditation techniques taught in the Self-Realization Fellowship Lessons. This, she declared, is the highest path to true freedom."

"I could understand why I must give up the wrong things, but I did not know that the seeker for God must lay all at His feet, must hold nothing back...

What I could not understand was why everything must go; why things that were right, that were mine, that harmed no one, why all the dear little rights and privileges must be taken from me. But they were so taken by God. He was thrusting me out of a life of dependence upon small comforts into one that should be lived for Him alone."

"I saw that an attitude that is perfectly justifiable for a householder is poisonous for one who has stepped upon the path of complete renunciation, holding the soul in bondage. I saw that God is a relentless Master, never accepting anything short of perfection, never satisfied if only a part is laid at His feet."

"We should put a hedge around our wants. That is, we should control them. Do not let them grow into rampant weeds that will impede your progress and drag down your mind from God."

"Our sufferings do not come from Him. They are the result of our ignorance. We suffer because we love wrong things, and suffering comes as result of our actions..."

For God Alone III

Here are some more excerpts from For God Alone: The Life and Letters of a Saint, and the writings of Sri Gyanamata...

"To improve the circumstances of your life, to raise yourself physically, mentally, and spiritually, change your attitude. Meet trials with courage, determination, and fortitude. When you need help, meditate deeply and try to contact God, but look to no lower source than to Him...Pray and affirm:

'I will reason, I will will, I will act,
but guide Thou my reason, will, and activity
to the right thing that I should do.'"

"Late one afternoon...I was filled with apprehension. I knew that it was not the will of God that I should be saved from the experience. Even at that moment it was moving towards me. Suddenly God told me the prayer He would listen to, and I said quickly:

'Change no circumstance of my life.
Change me.'"

"The thing about the life of Brother Lawrence that has stood out in my memory ever since I read the book The Practice of the Presence of God, is the simplicity of his relationship with God. When he failed, when he did wrong, he said:

'That is the way I am;
that is the way I shall always be
unless you help me.'

This simple prayer, this simple attitude of mind, shows the truest humility. It says,

'I know well that I am nothing,
but let Your power flow into me
and I shall be saved.
I shall be all that You want me to be,
all that I long to be.'

Tears and groans of shame and agony will not do for the soul what this simple prayer will do."

More on - For God Alone

There is actually some sunshine today, after several days of rain and drizzle, encouraging the heart to rejoice in this, the dead of winter!

This morning, I reflect on several messages received that deeply warm my heart. We never quite know how we will touch another's soul - or how our own may be touched as well...I am often amazed at the resultant web of connections that can be made in most unexpected ways.

I go down to the river briefly this morning, after not having visited for about a week. It is breezy, and the river seems wider than usual because of the rains. I stand at the top of the cliff and look down at the rocks and launch area, watching wave upon wave coursing downstream, thinking of how we are all like those waves - a legion of blessed souls interacting with one another - sometimes randomly bumping into each other and unexpectedly touching each others' lives. We never know whose touch will extend to us God's hand...

I ponder sacred insights that come to me about my own life, its own ever-changing purpose, my vocation, and my calling - and inwardly relate and connect it all to a wonderful prayer by Yogananda that I always begin my morning meditation practice with:

"Let Thy light shine forever
on the sanctuary of my devotion,
that I may be able to awake Thy love
in all hearts."

Before I share some more passages from Sri Gyanamata's writings, I would like to offer these two quotes from Ralph Waldo Emerson, sent to me by a friend who read yesterday's posting. They are in keeping with the tone and messages revealed in Gyanamata's letters:

"What lies behind us
and what lies before us
are tiny matters
compared with
what lies before us."

"Make the most of yourself,
for that is all there is of you."

And now from Sri Gyanamata herself:

"Teach me to meditate until I intuit Thee.
Teach me to pray until I find Thee.
Teach me to demand until I receive Thy Kingdom.
Teach me to see Thee until I find Thee.
Teach me to love Thee whether it is Thy pleasure
to reveal Thyself or not.
Teach me to meditate until I feel Thy Bliss.
Teach me to see Thee until Thou dost answer.
Teach me to fee Thy Peace, until Thou does
reveal Thyself as Bliss."

"I shall always remember the words of someone to me when I was undergoing the greatest suffering of my life. He was not a friend, but a complete stranger, who had the impulse to speak to me one day when I was out for a walk. He said, 'It had to be. It was all necessary for you.' And I answered, 'Yes, I know that what you say is true, I needed it.' His reply came quickly, and like a blow from the shoulder: 'Then glorify it!' That is the point. Since it is suffering that teaches us the truth and turns us toward God, why do we not thank and praise it for the work it does for us?"

And relating a dialogue between two great medieval mystics:

"[Henry] Suso describes a vision he had of Meister Eckhart after death...The Master [Eckhart] told him that he was in great glory, into which his soul was transformed and made godlike in God. Suso inquired what exercise was best calculated to advance a man who wished to be taken into the abyss of the divine essence. Eckhart's reply was that he must die to himself in entire detachment, receive everything as from God, and keep himself in unruffled patience with all men...

These three instructions, plus meditation, contain the only rule of life that any disciple needs: detachment; realization of God as the Giver; and unruffled patience. As long as we fail in any one of these three, we till have a serious spiritual defect to overcome..."

For God Alone

Last night I allowed myself to finish the book, God Alone: The Life and Letters of a Saint, about Sri Gyanamata, a disciple of Paramahansa Yogananda. I had been savoring each page I read, my senses filled with the sacredness of the writings.

I want to share some passages from her letters, meditations, and diary entries, over the next couple of days. Her words are full of insight, wisdom, and unfailing devotion, and are sure to bring comfort and solace to all...

From a letter written to Daya Mata, now the head of the Self-Realization Fellowship, when she was a young nun in the community:

" 1. See nothing, look at nothing, but your goal,
ever shining before you.
2. The things that happen to us do not matter;
what we become through them does.
3. Each day, accept everything as coming
to you from God.
4. At night, give everything back into His Hands."

"But God says, 'No. Come, lay all the dear innocent pleasures at My feet. Everything. Hold nothing back.' Until we obey that command, we cannot know that God Himself is the gratification, the satisfaction of all desires, and the only real one. He is the Joy, the Bliss that we were seeking on the mountain and beside the sea."

From Yogananda to Gyanamata:

"God must be attained, life or death - all obstacles must be removed by yourself through the help of God and Gurus."

"I say unto you that God is ever with you through the Gurus, and ever will be, and They are waiting for you when your work here is done. And whenever I join you there, we will talk about everything unsaid in this life, and there will be happiness unending, and I won't regret about not talking with you for lack of time here on earth. Your thoughts I ever treasure."

From Gyanamata:

"Observe some rule of silence. Outer silence is not to talk with the mouth. Inner silence is not to talk with the mind. It is in the silence of body, mind, and senses that you will hear God speak."

"When you become luminous there is no pain. There is only Bliss."

"This question was immediately presented to my soul. 'What did you come here for?' The answer was always, 'For God alone...'"

Broken Malas - Karma Released

I spend the day of a Guru's birthday in meditation and sacred practices, all throughout the day...

I have heard it said, that special energies surround one on the day of one's birthday. Emboldened by this thought and knowledge, I approach my meditation with an important request, sensing that God and Guru will not deny me...

I end the day by reading beautiful letters this Guru wrote to a Beloved disciple and glean so many sacred messages that bring solace to a wounded heart...

I do one last meditation in the evening before retiring for sleep, which takes me deep and it seems I lose myself in the heart of the cosmos and take leave of waking consciousness...

In the morning I awaken to find pieces of my garnet mala bracelet in my bed. I am heartbroken, but remember being told, that a broken mala signifies release of karma...It is also a reminder to detach once more and relinquish one more layer of being...

Is this the answer to my request? I feel it is - though I am not quite sure what it releases - something here or there - or somewhere in my past...

It does not matter...I know I have received whatever it was that I was meant to receive...

I sit in meditation in the early evening today, and lay the broken pieces of my mala bracelet at the feet of Babaji, Guru of Gurus, and give thanks - for what is seen...and what is unseen...

for what is given and for what is taken...

for what is and for what is not...

I finish this entry and the clock reads: 5:55 - it too is a sign...of Christ Consciousness...

It is only much later that I remember that January 6th is the Feast of the Epiphany, when the Wise Men brought their incredible gifts to the baby Jesus. On this day, children in many cultures receive gifts as well...

And I, am given a treasure...

In Waking, Eating, and Sleeping...

This day is the birthday of Paramahansa Yogananda, so I will honor the day with two quotes from his writings. The first one comes from the Inner Reflections 2009 calendar for this week, and the other is the last verse of my favorite poem by him, titled, God! God! God!:

"Simplicity means to be free of desires and attachments
and supremely happy within...
It entails neither hardship nor deprivation,
but the wisdom to work for and be content
with what you truly need."

"In waking, eating, working, dreaming, sleeping,
Serving, meditating, chanting, divinely loving,
My soul constantly hums, unheard by any:
God! God! God!"

(For the entire poem, see my entry for January 20, 2008)

Silencio

The river has taught me the art of silence...

Well, maybe not the art - but it has certainly deepened my appreciation for silence, and most of all, the river has taught me to listen deeply to the sounds of nature, the sounds that silence reveals - and to listen for the very sound of the Divine in my soul and in indeed, all of creation.

This is not an easy thing to do - for we are bombarded by noise. Since I live as a "semi-contemplative," I often feel assaulted when I have to go out and run the most simplest and basic of errands. There is not a store or restaurant it seems that doesn't pipe in something rather obnoxious or toxic into its environment, and into the ears of hurried souls who are already subject to an inordinate amount of stress and to a myriad of personal issues and afflictions.

I recently became acquainted with the music of Arvo Part, through the talented son of a cousin of mine.

Arvo Part's music is haunting - it speaks to the soul without adornment - the creative expression of a minimalist at heart - the music is both breathtakingly beautiful and undeniably spiritual at its core. It has truly captivated my heart. I wanted to share some of the quotes and notes from the album of "Silencio," because it so eloquently describes what it means to inhabit this place and spirit of silence, acknowledging the many gifts and graces it brings...

"Silentium! Silence! Sei still!
Speak not! Do not open your soul's intimate abode.
What you may feel, what you may dream -
In profundi let it steam.
Safeguard it in your spirit's mine
Let it ascend and then decline,
Like silent stars on heaven's dome.
Bathe in their light and watch them roam,
Admire them, splendid or bleak,
But in silence. Do not speak.

How can a heart be braced in words?
Another fathom what is yours?
And understand what you live by?
A thought expressed becomes a lie.
Don'd muddy springs, lucid and unique:
Drink from their depths but do not speak.

Learn to live within yourself. Explore a universe.
That's you. Behold between your soul's shores
All the mysterious thoughts. Know: noise
Rips the enigmatic lace, destroys
The magic chorus. Noon rays will make it weak.
Listen to its song. But do not speak."
- Fedor Tyutchev (1830) Translated by Elisabeth Konovalova

"One searches in the outer world as well as in other's reflections of oneself - with all its insecurities, joys, convictions, evaluations. The world observes these oscillations of our feelings with a proud indifference. Here and there a person hurries by, producing a sound that resembles one's own. But it's already gone, and one is again embraced by silence. Our pain and insomnia as part of the whole. Our dispair: a drop in an ocean. Death - the final bill, in which the challenge turns into a phantom. Ambitions, hopes, enchantment. All this finds its peace there in the world beyond.

Words irritate. Gestures mislead. Emotions dissolve. Only sounds speak a language that might be understood. If one opens the heart, would there be someone receptive enough? But who is listening? Who is able to feel it? Often I do ask myself, where does a heartbeat identical to mine exist? And the attempt of an answer is: out there, on the other end of my own sound."
- Gidon Kremer from Obertone

"Music must be given the chance to express itself. Words confine music. And then, music makes itself dependent on words. In my view, the very existence of music is jeopardized by today's society's obsession with communication."
- Arvo Part

"The odd sound. What a mercy to have that to turn to. Now and then. In dark and silence to close as if to light the eyes and hear a sound. Some object moving from its place to its last place. Some soft thing softly stirring soon to stir no more. To darkness visible to close the eyes and hear if only that. Some soft thing softly stirring soon to stir no more."
- Samuel Beckett, from Company

"One ancient hermit said to his disciple: 'Strive to enter the inner cell of your soul and there you will behold the heavenly cell. Both are one: you enter them by the same door. The staircase to Heaven is inside you: it exists in your heart.'

And it is true:
Our whole life is but an attempt to find this miraculous entrance.
All our deeds are but a timid knocking on this mysterious door.
All our hopes are to hear, one day, perhaps, a voice that would respond:
'Come in!'

For it is said: 'Knock and you will be let in.'"
- Vladimir Martynov

Be Still and Know

As I returned home after a busy and fruitful afternoon co-hosting an open house at the studio where I teach, I relished the immediate quiet and stillness of my home and meditation alcove. I sat on my purple meditation blankets as the sun went down, and one of my favorite verses from scripture spontaneously arose in my heart:

"Be still and know
that I am God."
- Psalm 46:10

This verse also made me think of Psalm 62 which begins:

"For God alone,
my soul waits in silence;
from Him comes my salvation.
He alone is my rock and my salvation..."

I have always felt at home with the Psalms, finding them to be very nurturing and evocative of many of my heart's feelings and experiences. I am equally at home with the sacred scriptures of the Hindus and the Buddhists.

This morning, my yoga student noted, that many yoga teachers are naturally led to become teachers because of their background as bodyworkers and/or other related interests, but that I had come to yoga through my background in theology - making my experience of yoga and my teaching somewhat unique.

I thought of this, and I had to agree. I cannot divorce the practice of yoga from my own spiritual experience and background, and have always felt comfortable marrying the two. When I found Anusara Yoga, I felt I had come home, because this style emphasizes that it is first and foremost a spiritual practice.

Coming to the mat or my meditation cushion enables me to be still and know...It enables me to connect with the Divine at least a couple of times a day - so that despite the flurry of activities that might pull me out of the experience of being centered - I can at certain times, return to that connection again...

"Be still and know,
that I am God.
Be still and know,
that I breathe
in you,
as you.

Be still and know,
I am never farther
than your breath.

Be still and know,
Your heart
and mine
beat as one."