The Other Side of the River

I arise early, on this Sunday morning, with the first feeble rays of sunlight seeping into me, and rousing me from sleep. A heavy fog blankets my yard and neighborhood, and I excitedly make my way down to the river in silence...

It is breathtakingly beautiful in the park. Herds of deer grazing, breakfast in deep oblivion, illuminated by pristine shafts of early morning light, piercing through the fog and the trees, which punctuate the skies, like exclamation points...

I step onto the boat launch, inches from the water, and am silent witness to squirming tadpoles. I yearn to paddle on this exquisite morning, but I must make my way to the other side of the river to teach a very early yoga class...

The river before me disappears into the gray mist - blending into the sky and the shoreline of the neighboring state I will momentarily be crossing. I cannot ascertain where one begins and the other ends. I watch a pair of fishermen silently glide away from the shore, swallowed by the thick and silvery tapestry. They slowly fade and disappear, as if they were being erased or as if they were crossing into the fabled island of Avalon - the mythic and enchanted island from the Arthurian legends, and portal to another dimension...

Nearly three years ago, I began writing this blog, almost on a whim or impulse, without advance planning, at the same time I started visiting this river almost daily, over the span of a year and half. In the first five or six posts, I wrote about my longing to go to the other side of the river, at a time I could not have anticipated being called to commune with the river itself. I did not imagine that one day, I would receive an instruction to step into the river, or that I would acquire Grace, my kayak, and proceed to navigate these healing waters as I paddled through a river of emotions and issues for months and seasons at a time.

I listened to the voice within, that beckoned way back then, and the song from the film, "The Motorcycle Diaries" that came to mind at that time. It won the Oscar for "Best Original Song" some years back, even though its original lyrics are in Spanish. Because it was these lyrics that so spoke to me then, I offer them here, with the English translation immediately following...

Al Otro Lado del Rio

Clavo mi remo en el agua
llevo tu remo en el mio
Creo que he visto una luz
al otro lado del rio

El dia le ira pudiendo
poco a poco al frio
Creo que he visto una luz
al otro lado del rio

Sobre todo, creo que no todo esta perdido.
Tanta lagrima, tanta lagrima
y yo soy un vaso vacio

Oigo una voz que me llama,
casi un suspiro
Rema, rema, rema
Rema, rema, rema

En esta orilla del mundo
lo que no es presa es baldio
Creo que he visto una luz
al otro lado del rios

Yo, muy serio, voy remando,
muy adentro y sonrio.
Creo que visto una luz
al otro lado del rio.

The Other Side of the River

I plunge my paddle into the water
I carry your paddle in mine
I believe I have a light
On the other side of the river

The day will come when we will be able to conquer
Little by little, the cold
I believe I have seen a light
On the other side of the river

Above all, I believe that all is not lost
So many tears, so many tears
And I am an empty glass

I hear a voice that calls to me,
almost as a sigh:
Row, row, row!
Row, row, row!

In this border of the world
What is trapped, will not bear fruit
I believe I have seen a light
On the other side of the river

I, very seriously, continue rowing
I smile, very deeply inside, for
I believe I have seen a light
On the other side of the river

And thus today, nearly three years later, I go to the other side of the river, as I have, crossing over in more ways than I could have ever foreseen or imagined.

Final Thoughts on Forgiveness Part II

The light of day is waning, and I am drawn to continue the thread started yesterday, bringing closure to last night's post - especially, since many resonated with it. Are we not, after all, spiritual beings having the same human experience?

I would love to report that I had a day devoid of irritations - but it was not so. I am often most irritated when I have expectations - of how others should act or behave - and of how my days should unfold and interactions with others flow. I know. NOBODY appointed me Master of the Universe or Master of Ceremonies! But somehow, I manage to constantly forget it!

So, I offer these words by Caroline Myss, from her book, Entering the Castle, which I shared in my "Yoga of Forgiveness" class on the last day we met this past Wednesday. This passage was suggested by a friend. Perhaps, as this day concludes, or begins for some, we may find a kernel of wisdom or two in here that will illuminate the dark spaces within...

"Contemplate what it means to be called to love in a place you would rather not go...

Whom can you not love? How would you recognize if your heart opened and you were directed to embrace someone whom you had previously banned from your heart? Do you have to make an effort to fuel an old anger or bitterness? Your heart may begin to crack open. Do you discuss old hurts and traumas again and again, out of habit? You may be consciously preventing your heart from opening. Being judgmental of others and holding on to negative thoughts blocks the emergence of mystical love. You cannot be bitter or unforgiving and be a conduit for love and grace. Heal your heart! Allow it to give up old wounds.

Practice forgiveness, but also take this practice to the mystical plane... Forgiveness is an act of spiritual alchemy through which you detach your consciousness from the entire paradigm of human justice.You remove yourself from the center of righteousness and self-righteousness, where you usually find your personal justification for any behavior, no matter how grievous. Only the soul is capable of the mystical act of forgiveness, in which you surrender to the power of God, withdrawing any personal need or desire to remain attached.

Discovering this capacity to respond with transcendent compassion to one's aggressors is exactly the quality of love that John of the Cross discovered during his imprisonment, which led him to write The Dark Night of the Soul. A much greater and profoundly cosmic love lies within us, but we must break through the forceful power of our injured egos to discover this love. Forgiveness is truly a mystery, for it challenges every bit of common sense and rational thought operating within us, and yet that is precisely the way of the mystic - to transcend reason and act within the power of divine mystery.

Begin with a prayer such as: "I desire to forgive more than I am capable of forgiving, but not to forgive is even more difficult. Help me break through the walls of my ego and let me experience even a drop of the love that transforms resentments into compassion."

And there you have it, the answer is always to love more. You cannot be a conduit for love and grace and be unforgiving at the same time. Yes, the answer is always love...The Course in Miracles teaches us that everything is born out of love or fear. If we withhold our love - it is because we are fearful of not receiving it back - or not being able to give it fully - or perhaps where it may lead. We are fearful of loving because it leads to an opening of the truest and deepest kind. So, forgiveness, like charity, begins at home - in the cave of our hearts. All the great spiritual traditions teach us to go into this secret enclosure within our hearts. It is there that we meet the Divine, our Higher Power, or something greater than ourselves. And it is here that we will always find everything we need. It is not without - but within...

"All through love,
nothing through constraint."
~St. Francis de Sales

Final Thoughts on Forgiveness

I had one of those days where I was constantly irritated, by the littlest things...At being made to wait - rudely at times - ignored by salesclerks at a pharmacy, and at a movie theater. I was irritated at not sleeping enough hours - and spending too many of them in the car this week. All these things made me reflect on forgiveness and accepting what is - lessons that must be learned and re-learned again...

The fruit of our meditation or yoga practice can often be noted by a sense of greater patience and capacity for love, compassion, and forgiveness. Sometimes I think I am making progress. Other times, it seems I'm being sent back to the drawing board. There are weeks and days where I am tossed between a mind and attitude trending towards expansiveness - and one that wants to suck on resentments like a lollipop!

Did I mention I was also irritated at not meditating as often or as long this week? But then, whose fault is it anyway?

This week, I finished my "Yoga of Forgiveness" course. The wonderful group engaged in a six week journey through the exploration of tools and resources to refer to on an on-going basis in order to help with this process. Forgiveness is a choice - and it is one we make over and over again in our lives. It is never an easy path.

On the last day, we experienced a long Yoga Nidra - meaning "yogic sleep" - a guided meditation of sorts that involves the rotation of one's consciousness and setting an intention to shift one's perspective and experience of a particular aspect. I also shared with the group some insights on this topic by Caroline Myss and her book, Entering the Castle. A friend had suggested the readings...

"Of the many challenges for the reasonable mind, few are more difficult than forgiveness. For a culture that believes in law and order, it is difficult to accept the spiritual imperative to forgive. Forgiveness is, in fact, the most irrational spiritual task you could be given because it stands in direct opposition to all that you have been taught about fairness and justice. And of all the many injuries that are difficult to forgive, among the most difficult is being humiliated. But forgiveness is a mystical necessity. The mind cannot fulfill such a divine order and in fact rebels against it, tossing out justifications for remaining unforgiving while tell us we should be forgiving. A true act of forgiveness is a leap into mystical consciousness, an initiation by choice into divine trust.

Your soul is inherently forgiving. We struggle with forgiveness because we want to forgive. It is an effort to be bitter and unforgiving. Such negativity does not come naturally; it has to be fueled and the source of that fuel is your mind. You must continually give yourself reasons to remain angry. You have to relive memories and traumas in order to keep the fires of rage burning. Granted, some traumas are so deep that they pursue you and require special healing; but even these enormous wounds need to be released. At some point, you need to silence your reasons for not forgiving and turn toward the mystery of forgiveness...

Reflect on the difficulties you face with this challenge. With each act of forgiveness, your mind will produce a list of pro's and con's. Pride always plays a role. It is for you to examine each situation and decide for yourself whether you are prepared to withdraw your soul from the battlefield and enter into the healing mystery of forgiveness."

Much to ponder here, and more to write about later....

The River Calls

On this overcast day, cool and crisp, and reminiscent of the coming fall season, I am drawn to the river once again, with my coffee cup in hand, as I started almost every day, for the course of a year and and a half - three years ago in December...

The river calls, and I return again...

I came to this river to meditate almost daily, at a time during so many transitions and unanswered questions. I return once more, at a similar time once again, wondering what the future holds, and what will for me, in time unfold...

It is hard to see, and harder still to know - what will come and what will be...But one more time, the river calls, and it still flows...

I return again, not sure what to answer - or even ask...

But this is a different river. They say you never step into the same river twice...My heart longs to get into the water to paddle, but I have deadlines to meet, and preparation for teaching and subbing for others this week...So I pause for just a moment, to offer these words...

I walk along the riverbank - and the shoreline is different from what I remembered it to be. The rocks that I sat and meditated on, nearly a footprint from the water, are buried under huge trunks of trees, carried downstream during the heavy rains and floods of this past spring...

I wander up the well worn and beaten dirt path along the cliff where the waters topped off during the peak of all the flooding, barely a few months ago, and I find new benches have been installed, on a newly constructed cobblestone patio. The view here is different, but it still brings to mind the many solitary mornings spent in the depths of winter, where I sat and shivered through Lovingkindness practices and meditations. Nothing ever remains the same, and yet, I still pine for a past I cannot embrace, and should no longer cling to, for it keeps my soul tethered to limbo. I yearn for love and a state of being that can only be sustained briefly, in this dimension...

Yes, the river calls, and I hear myself softly sing these words written by Mary Chapin Carpenter...

"I found myself between two places neither of them home
I could not recognize the faces
I've never felt so alone

I found myself between two choices - to settle or to run
All my life I've heard the voices
This time mine's the only one...

I wanna feel what the wind feels like
I wanna go that high and feel no fear
except being down here,
Holding up the sky...holding up the sky

Life astounds us in an instant
Changing all we know
Blink just once and then you've missed it
All you can do is watch it go...

I found myself between two lifetimes
The sunset and the dawn
I reached out and took the life-line offered up to me
between here and gone...

I wanna feel what the wind feels like...
and feel no fear except being down here
Holding up the sky..."

And so, it was, and so it is once more, in a never-ending cycle that returns again...

The Power and Wisdom of Dreams

Dreams can deliver powerful messages to us, if we have the ears to hear, the eyes to see, and the openness and wisdom to understand...

This summer, I have had many powerful and sometimes disturbing dreams. Each and every one of them has arrived, knocking on the doors of my heart, bearing insights I cannot ignore...

Some dreams have been frightening, waking me up with a dreadful start. All of them - vivid and lucid - arrived delivering unmistakable messages. I believe that once I gave the intention earlier this summer to no longer depend on others for direction, and trust my intuitions instead, my dreams - taking center stage - manifested incredible power, authority, and wisdom from the Other Side...

In one recent and memorable dream, the father of a dear friend of mine, who transitioned a few years back, came to me in a beautiful garden, populated by very happy beings. He gave me a very poignant message and spiritual advice. I was later told that he has visited a number of my friend's cherished ones, offering needed guidance to all those in need...

This past week I had a dream so rich with symbolism and meaning, it has haunted me for days...

In this dream, I was driving on a nondescript road that ended abruptly and without warning. All of a sudden - the road just simply disappeared and I could not apply the brakes on the car. Instead, I let go, driving off into the vast empty expanse before me - as if I were Thelma without Louise, driving into the Grand Canyon, enveloped in an endless and luminous sky.

Upon reflection, I came to understand the significance of this part of the dream, very symbolic of arriving at the end of a road or life journey. I am in transition in more ways than one - and not quite sure of what I will be doing or where I am going. It became clear to me that driving off the road and into the endless sky invited me to trust in the unknown and wherever I was being led...

The car did finally land after some time in free-fall or suspended animation, coming to rest in a tunnel, also symbolic of transitions. I recall thinking - it all ends here, since I had nothing to ensure my survival. Suddenly, I realized I was in a dream and having a lucid moment! I told myself - that the experience I was having wasn't real. And to prove it to myself, I decided to intentionally touch the roof of the car. Since this was a dream after all - I knew I couldn't have any tangible sensations of something so concrete and physical. But, much to my surprise, every time I reached up to touch the roof of the car - I could feel the texture of the fabric, and how it very distinctly felt under my fingers. My hand did not go through the roof as if I had been endowed with super powers. So, I was confused.

For a moment - I felt total shock. Wasn't this a dream after all?

But then, don't so many of the ancient yogic texts, and contemporary spiritual writers tell us - that what we think and define as our reality - is really nothing more than an illusion?

What is real then? And what is unreal? Was my dream real? Or is the world and the reality that I inhabit not real instead?

This simple mantra from the Brihadaranyaka Upanishad then came to mind:

"Lead me from the unreal to the Real.
Lead me from darkness to the Light.
Lead me from the temporary to the Eternal."

Was this, not in essence, what my dream was conveying to me on some level?

In a split second, I realized, that what I thought was real - was simply not real at all. In that one instant, I knew that what is Unseen - is more real than the drama that I live out and play every day of my life.

Paramahansa Yogananda, in his writings, often describes the events of our lives as nothing more than a movie that is projected onto a screen - born out of the Eternal for our own lessons. He often admonished his followers and readers, not to get caught up into the drama of those events, for in time, they fade - as events in all lifetimes invariably will.

In my "dream" I eventually stepped out of the car and was instantly transported to a beautiful place, and welcomed by lovely people who were all very content and at peace. This was the second time this summer I delighted in the beauty of another plane of existence.

There are so many messages for us waiting to be discovered. We are offered so many opportunities if we have the eyes to see and the ears to hear...

While in Hilton Head last month, I went for a walk along the beach on the night of the Full Moon. I took several pictures of the sun going down with my camera and when I returned home, I was annoyed because the pictures looked as if they had been ruined by what I first thought were lots of raindrops. But the odd thing was, it wasn't raining! And the waves never sprayed my camera.

On closer inspection, I noticed the pictures were filled with orbs, which are believed by many, to represent beings from the spirit realms. One of the pictures in particular, was so densely covered by the orbs, I was both shocked and stunned. I knew that even though I was walking alone on the shoreline of the beach, I had truly not been alone, and that many angels, guides, and beings of all kinds were walking alongside me, making their presence known in these photographs!

So what are the lessons conveyed in this dream and these pictures?

Trust in the Unseen. Ask to be led from the unreal to the Real. Know that you are never alone. And ask for guidance. Ask to be shown the way. Ask for what you need. But always, remember, that you must ask!

A Need for Solitude

The afternoon begins its measured descent into the waning light of day, as it deliberately chases the coming evening and its blanketing darkness. The golden light and the length of summer days reverses its trajectory and yields its gains without fanfare towards the advancing Autumn. In this sacred time between light of day, and dark of night, I take a moment to re-visit where I am, embraced by my eternal yearning, for greater solitude...

I am not drawn to write, or to be with others, at this time, and I even refrain from the pull of social networking sites - choosing instead, to journey more deeply inward into a place of no words and greater silence...

Memories of ushering in this summer in the company of friends at Wolf Trap, where we dutifully worshipped at the quirky altar of the guru-like Garrison Keillor, arise momentarily, before becoming scattered like the first leaves falling in the dryness of this late summer. This glorious event and yearly ritual, spent in the company of the same friends, has formally marked the start of the summer season for the past six years. But now, we have arrived, to this latter half of August, reunited again at Wolf Trap, with the length of days getting shorter, as we commence our journey once more, towards the heart of winter...

We come together to imbibe poetic and introspective musings offered by Mary Chapin Carpenter, a spiritual and chronological kindred soul of sorts, whose poignant songs paint an evocative portrait of experiences and feelings, enriched by insights, that mirror our own...

This gifted composer and songstress, in the changing light of the day and its perennial dance throughout the seasons, simultaneously captures and reflects the essence of my life and soul, inviting me to return to the sweet stillness and solitude where only everything is real...

I delight in sharing this song in the company of a treasured soul, whose intense desire for solitude eclipses my very own, but whose glance acknowledges that the magical time of day when the light changes everything, also claims my heart...

I Have a Need for Solitude

I have a need
For solitude
I'll never be
Safe in crowded rooms
I like the sound
Of silence coming on
I come around
When everyone has gone

I have a need
For cool, verdant spaces
Beneath the trees
Secret empty places
Nobody knows
So no one will intrude
I have a need
For solitude

But you can find me, when the light is changing
At that time of day when there's
Little day remaining
You can find me where I've been waiting
Waiting her for you

I never was
The pretty girl in school
I never was
Fast, tough and cool
All I was
All my life it seems
Was hard to love
But you can find me, when the light is changing
At that time of day when there's
Little day remaining

I have a need
For solitude
I'll never be
Safe in crowded rooms
I like the sound
Of silence coming on
I come around when all the rest have gone...

Dancing in the Divine

About four years ago, I self-published a volume of my poetry, titled Dancing in the Divine: More Poems from the Heart of Practice, and this theme of dancing in the Divine is one I chose to re-visit this week as a class theme.

On Sunday, Anusara Yoga celebrated its 13th birthday. The word Anusara is often translated as "flowing with grace," or "stepping into the current of grace." Anusara at its essence, is a practice which invites us to "align with the Divine." If we align with something - we pulsate in resonance with it - our energy dances with it.

Most of us like to dance - behind closed doors in the privacy of our own company where no one else is watching - or we like to do it with a special someone. When we align - we dance - there is a certain fluidity and freedom of movement that occurs when the energy of the Divine moves through us - and in our practice, the Anusara Universal Principles of Alignment lend their support, enabling us to create the conditions for the expansion of this energy.

In the Siva Sutras, a Tantric text, there is a beautiful sutra that simply asserts that "The Self is the Dancer."

It means that when we align with the Divine - we are the dancer. We dance with the Divine. Who we are at our essence is Spirit - and it - or we - are free - and it wants to make itself known and experienced. Who we are at our essence dances with the Divine in the practice - and in the dance - the essence of who we are is revealed as we merge with the Divine.

So dance. In everything you do and are - simply dance. Dance like there is no tomorrow. Dance like everything depends on it. Enjoy the freedom. Enjoy aligning. Enjoy the dance!

"It's the heart afraid of breaking
than never learns to dance."
~ Bette Midler

Musings on Eat, Pray, Love

Today, I excitedly, and quite spontaneously, accompanied a friend to one of the first showings of Eat, Pray, Love.

This is one of those rare books that has spoken to me on many different levels, and I have read and re-read it every year since it's publication - even before it became the wildly popular memoir it now is - and before anyone really knew anything about it. I was divinely led to pick it up off a shelf, enthralled by its cover and title, encompassing three of the most significant interests in my life! But today, I just as easily lost myself in the exquisite adaptation of this work, and the film did not disappoint on any level. I thoroughly enjoyed every moment!

The movie was lush, visually stunning, filled with wonderful gems of wisdom and insight, and it contained beautiful portrayals of some of the most poignant moments in the book. Just a week ago, I had students participating in my "Yoga of Forgiveness" class read a section of the book, where the author, Elizabeth Gilbert, finally makes the decision to let go of her past and forgive herself, on the rooftop of her Indian guru's ashram.

I re-read this section over and over again, a couple of years ago, when I was held captive by the clutches of deep depression. Liz forgives herself with a ritual, suggested to her, and appropriately titled, "Instructions for Freedom." Because this section of the book had been so helpful and beneficial to me, I asked my students to consider their situations in life, and write their own instructions for forgiveness.

The movie is very faithful to the book - it's themes and messages - and invites deeper reflection on so many levels. We are asked to consider that every person and experience we encounter in life - offers us a lesson - so there are truly no accidents that occur to us.

The movie also invites us to live fully and to indulge in the wonderful Italian practice of "dolce far niente" - the sheer enjoyment of those special moments when we are simply doing nothing! It enabled me to recall how years ago, I would occasionally encounter a student totally resistant to learning how to meditate. The concept of not doing anything - even for a few moments - was so foreign to some of them. I used to tell these students that meditating was simply the art of learning to waste time gracefully...

Several times in the last couple of months, I have used the metaphor of being at a crossroads of sorts in my life - so it was such a pleasure to once more hear the delicious Italian word - "traversiamo" - for it not only encourages me to consider where I have been thus far - but it gently nudges me go forward - and cross over to the other side - and all that awaits there - with courage.

The book, like the movie, is really a celebration of the heart, finding our own path, living life to the fullest, and connecting with the Divine. We are reminded by Elizabeth Gilbert, that the Divine always dwells within us - as us - and thus is never far.

If you loved the book, treat yourself to the movie. It is a feast for the senses and the spirit!

Hard Edges, Soft Edges

There are hard edges to every soul...

And there are soft edges to every heart...

And vice versa...I know...Because I came into this life embodying both...

I walk, in the intense heat of the morning, reflecting on so much, and I hear the words of Snatam Kaur, a subtle track, laid underneath a rich mantra, whispered solely for me, given and received as a personal message:

"Follow your heart!
Fulfill your destiny!
Awaken your soul!"

At a time of great transitioning and re-imagining my life through a different lens, these words - along with the new personal mantra I have embraced in my meditations - arrive as a precious reminder of the never-ending discovery of my own true purpose...

I tell a neighbor, early in the morning, as she is watering her thirsty plants on what will be another scorching and record-setting day, that for too long I ignored my intuition - trusting the insights of others - sometimes more deeply than my own wisdom. But now I have chosen to listen more carefully, to the whispers of my inner soul, at times distancing myself from voices that drowned out my own...

I think too, of fellow Anusara Yoga Certified Teacher, Katie Lane, who wisely observed the inherent pulsation that is at the heart of the First Universal Principle of Alignment in Anusara Yoga - "Opening to Grace," which is by no means a static principle!

"The First Principle is both passive and active. There is a softening to receive the moment - without clinging or pushing away. And then, there is choosing to engage what's being offered, from the highest place inside."

Like each one of the subsequent Principles - there is a dance - sometimes there is a hardening that transpires - followed by a softening in our perspectives, our approaches, our understanding, and our embodiment of all that Grace offers...

I savor the words of Todd Norian, another gifted Anusara certified teacher, who reminds his readers in a recent newsletter, that:

"Grace is always present. ALWAYS. We don't experience it at the time because we are cloaked, blocked, or preoccupied with regrets from the past, resentment, sadness...or deep feelings of anxiety, worry, or loneliness."

I come home from my walk and re-read these words by Todd:

"The most important quality to get in touch with your deep inner longing of the heart is to awaken, a desire to evolve, to be free, or to just be happy..."

And of course to do this, he urges greater receptivity and softness...

Yes, there are always hard and rough edges to our experiences, situations, our spiritual practices, our work, and our relationships - but they also point the way to the inherent soft edges waiting to be re-discovered once more, at our very essence, that will lead us to the places we need to go...

Embodying Radical Forgiveness

I am very much aware that recent astrological events are stirring the pot for many. For example, we have just witnessed a conjunction of 7 planets in a T square position - that has not occurred - and will not be repeated for centuries. This is referred to as a Cardinal Grand Cross.

This month will also be a witness to 5 Sundays, Mondays, and Tuesdays, and this happens once every 832 years! And from a numerological perspective, as a friend noted on Facebook yesterday, this is a call for greater balance and enlightenment in our lives. Much more could be said of all of these things, but suffice it for now to simply mention - that while our emotions may be challenged at this time, we must work hard at not giving in to them or being ruled by them. It is a time of great change for many...

Yesterday, I thought of this as I prepared for my Yoga of Forgiveness course, by transcribing some elements from the "Finding Peace: Guided Practices for Radical Forgiveness" CD by Colin Tipping, who is the author of the book, Radical Forgiveness. Let me share some of this wonderful information with you, because it might prove helpful during this incredibly trying time that is inviting us all into greater change and transformation. And how appropriate it is to examine more deeply our relationships and work on releasing issues that impede our growth. What follows is an edited transcription of a section on the CD:

Radical Forgiveness implies that there is a different way of looking at life and living.

Radical Forgiveness asserts there is nothing to forgive because from a spiritual point of view - nothing wrong every happened. This asks us to open to a totally new way of looking at life and how it unfolds.

Radical Forgiveness asks that we bring empathy and compassion to a situation and that we be open to the possibility that we had a hand in creating the situation. At the spiritual level we are complicit in bringing that situation into being as an opportunity to learn and grown. We agree to be victims and perpetrators for a soul lesson. Things don't happen to us - they happen for us - thus shifting our perspective to a whole new way of looking at reality. Everything that happens, does so, for a reason.

Radical Forgiveness implies that we agreed to experience what we do in this lifetime. Therefore, our enemies are really angels who agreed to take on that role in our lives. And we attract those people into our lives that will mirror the places where we need to do the work.

There is of course, a lot more to this. Colin Tipping provides this wonderful Radical Forgiveness Worksheet and recommends writing three letters to release and forgive people and issues holding us back.

Consider looking into this book and its practices if it speaks to you in any way. It will enable you to weather the tempest and storms that will be with us for some time to come - as we evolve as a people and as a planet.

Longing for the River's Silence

Amidst so much busyness, I crave the silence and stillness within, that I often find, floating on the river...

And as always, messages arrive, from sundry places...

"As timely as a river, God's life passes into this world..."
~ Wendell Berry

"Silence is the place of reflection and contemplation,
and where we can connect with the deep knowing,
to the deep wisdom way."
~ Angeles Arriens

"Growth takes place in a person
by working at a deep inner level
in a sustained atmosphere of silence."
~ Dr. Ira Progoff

Silence beckons - like the ebb and flow of ocean tides - and the waves of the river - in a constant state of spanda - Divine pulsation - in an infinite expression of the eternal dance between contraction and expansion...

My heart and soul are carried by those waves - not knowing where I am going - but very much certain that it takes me where I must go, as it reveals in due time, all that I must know...

Like those waves, I too, am infinite, and they remind me that at my essence, I am always free...

I think of these words by Johnny Snyder, a world-class kayaker, who wisely observes:

"When you journey on this moving force of life, you learn how to coexist with it and use its power. When you connect with the river, you're connecting with the blood of the earth, the essence of life itself: water. I dance on the rivers - it's my meditation..."

Yes, I too - dance on the river - as my own meditation and journey into greater silence and healing...

The river is a metaphor for my life's journey, it reminds me that:

"The mouth of the river may be beautiful.
It doesn't remember the womb of its beginning.
It doesn't look back to where it's been
or wonder who ahead of it polished the rough stones."
~ Linda Hogan

I am once more called to journey more deeply inward, and to hug into my core - applying the principle of Muscular Energy, like the banks of the river - so that I can harness and once more reclaim the raw power within...

It is a long, lonely, but necessary journey and I must ford the river on my own. Yet, I am blessed by the presence of many dear soul companions on the banks of the river, cheering on, lending their quiet support, with a precious few, following me along the river's shores, on a parallel path...

Morning Ruminations on Forgiveness

I am now halfway into teaching the short course on the Yoga of Forgiveness at Willow Street Yoga Center. But really, it is more about its facilitation, because we are all ultimately, teachers and students to one another. And of course, as teachers, we simply teach what we need to know and learn...

Yesterday, I shared these words from a poem titled, "Forgiveness," written by Gerald Jampolsky, MD, and they simply took my breath away...I found myself reflecting on them over, and over again...

I have much more to share about this course, but it must wait for now...

I offer these powerfully searing words, which are feeding me at the moment, as morsels to feed your own soul and heart, throughout this day, and the remainder of this week. May you masticate them and extract from them whatever it is that you need...

It is never too early
to forgive.
It is never too late
to forgive.

How long does it take
to forgive?

It depends on your belief system.

If you believe it will never happen,
It will never happen.

If you believe it will take six months,
It will take six months.

If you believe it will take but a second,
That's all that it will take.

I believe with all my heart
That peace will come to the world
When each of us takes the
Responsibility of forgiving everyone.
Including ourselves, completely.

A Soul Wakes Up

How does a soul wake up? In so many different ways...

What makes a soul wake up? So many different things...

Like, meditating or practicing yoga, in the early morning with the windows wide open, after a long, hot summer, to the sweet sounds of birds happily chirping...

Like, paddling on a river you have all to yourself - surrounded only by blue herons and creatures great and small...

Like, spending time with a treasured friend, and laughing joyously with great abandon...

Like, being in the effortless company of a like-minded soul, that energizes your own, and never drains you in any way...

Like, listening to great music as you dance all around the house...

Like, completing a designated task, and crossing it off the list, and then enjoying the fruits of a job well done...

Like, reading, and writing, with all the time and not a care in the world...

Like, going for a long ride or walk in a park, or along the beach...

There are many things that make us feel alive, and make our souls wake up - like laughter - as Hafiz so gently reminds....

Laughter

What is laughter? What is laughter?
It is God waking up! O it is God waking up!
It is the sun poking its sweet heat out
From behind a cloud
You have been carrying too long,
Veiling your eyes and heart.

It is Light breaking ground for a great Structure
That is your Real body - called Truth.

It is happiness applauding itself and then taking flight
To embrace everyone and everything in this world.

Laughter is the polestar
Held in the sky by our Beloved,
Who eternally says,

"Yes, dear ones, come this way,
come this way towards Me and Love!

Come with your tender mouths moving
And your beautiful tongues conducting songs
And with your movements - your magic movements
Of hands and feet and glands and cells - Dancing!

Know that to God's Eye,
All movement is a Wondrous Language,
And Music - such exquisite, wild Music!"

O, what is laughter, Hafiz?
What is this precious love and laughter
Budding in our hearts?

It is the glorious sound
Of a soul waking up!

~ Hafiz

Endings and Beginnings

I arise in the morning with the freshness of the day, and very much sensing the energy of a new month...

I sit in meditation, more deeply and longer than I have in weeks, and I am ready to re-commit myself to my path once again...

My day becomes consumed with painting a spare bedroom off of my home yoga studio - and I realize, that every time I am in the midst of major transitions in my life, I paint a room!

I recall a couple of years ago, when I was still very much in the throes of depression, sitting in an airport, and reading how the color of a room contributes very much to one's moods - its elevation as well as its descent into denser regions. I came home, and painted my bathroom the loudest, in my face, yellow that I could find - to tackle the depths of winter and the gathering storms of whatever darkness attempted to settle in my mind. I painted with the intent that this shade of yellow give voice to what I could not articulate in that moment. I willed it to assertively scream back to me, that there was more to life than whatever was holding me captive. This loud yellow would serve as a reminder that everything shall one day pass...

But today, I choose a lavender color to paint this room, and it is delicate, and exquisite, and lovely - all wrapped into one very appealing hue...

I continue to let go and set boundaries and create space for something that is coming - I know not what - only that it has to come...

I delight in how beautiful the room looks as I finish, and my heart smiles as it recalls the evening Facebook post by a friend acknowledging, that "It is all shri - and its all up to me!"

Yes, I look at this room, and this new month - and realize it is shri - it is beauty, and abundance, and goodness - and it is my choice to see it, and create it everywhere - in every encounter and aspect of my life...

This exercise in painting, invites patience, a hard virtue for me to embody, but it also invites divesting, moving on and forward, lightening up, and creating space...

For the first time, in a long time, I feel more energetic, and I invite this month and its gifts into my life...

And just for today, I created a thing or two of beauty...