You Don't Need Much to Be Happy

They say, you don't need much to be happy...

They say, that happiness is a choice, or a state of mind or being, but I can't seem to wrap my mind around that today...

In a few short hours, I will attend the wake of a young woman, a beloved former student, cut down in the prime of her youth, at the same time that I await to hear if a nephew will be hospitalized...

And somehow, in my heart of hearts, I know that all these things are true - happiness is a choice - it comes from living more fully in the present and accepting all that is - as it is. And I know that it is gratitude that opens the door...

I have tried to learn this lesson this year. I have tried to embody it - and yet it still eludes me. I know that illusion occludes this reality from being fully understood and embraced...

I have walked this last week or so - listening to these lyrics by Mary Chapin Carpenter - hoping that every day, in every way, they become more firmly woven into the fabric of my life:

Don’t need much to be happy
four walls and a roof overhead
books and food in my belly
cool sheets upon the bed

A fire that warms up December
sound of a thaw in the eaves
sometimes it’s hard to remember
how tough we are to please

All in good time
somehow I find
days that still shine with light
all in good stead
I’m safe and I’m fed
with dreams in my head
good night
The feel of my hand being taken
driving at night all alone
the breeze on a warm summer evening
and coming home

All in good time
somehow you find
days that still shine with light
all in good stead
You’re safe and you’re fed
with dreams in your head
good night

Don’t need much to be happy
a friend to soften a fall
and something to show for my labors
after all

I had to learn to be grateful
I had to learn how to see
mistakes that might have proved fatal
are gifts I now receive

Living in the Light

Some people come into this world, and make all the difference...

Some people come into your life, and leave it forever changed...

Some people come into your life - and as a dear friend and songwriter once sang - leave footprints in your heart and your soul...

Some people come into your life - and despite immense tragedy and suffering - manage to truly live in the light...

Some people come into your life, simply to point the way...

Some people come into your life and make their mark - in very quiet and unassuming ways...

The gifted poet, Mary Oliver asked in her poem about summer:

"Tell me, what is it that you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?"

I still ask myself that question, while some never get the chance to do so...

Why do we come into this world?

"We come into this exquisite world
to experience ever more deeply
our divine courage, freedom and light."
~ Hafiz

Some people come into the world to shine light - and when they leave this world - go back into that Light...

Yesterday, on the Summer Solstice, on a day of beginnings and endings, one such soul left this world. But I believe she was greeted with great joy on the Other Side of the Veil...

Christine Weeks, beloved student, friend, and soul - rest now, in the arms of angels - and bask in God's Light and Love! Do not forget us, for I know that I will never forget you!

Summer Solstice Ruminations

On this day of the Summer Solstice, I say goodbye to the first part of this year, and to a concluding phase of my life...

On this day, I close the doors on what has been one ministry and open the windows to breathe in the air of something that is not yet...

As I taught my last yoga class of the session this morning, and just before I conclude teaching my last in a place that has been spiritual home to me for over six years, I reflect on how endings, even though they hold the seeds and key to something new, can be so bittersweet. While intellectually I know it is time to move on, and that I made the right choice right now given some health considerations - in my heart feels like an entirely different matter... I've never been great at letting go...

It has been a year of unexpected changes for me - so many endings, deaths, and a dire diagnosis here and there - for so many that I know... Surely this year thus far, has not in any way turned out to be what I had envisioned or expected. And despite all its difficulties and the subsequent endings engendered, I still am able to recognize the inherent blessings in everything that happens...

The only constant in life is change - so I was reminded once again - as friends I met for lunch today, brought this to my attention...

Reading Jai me Allison's yoga newsletter, today, I was also reminded that we are entering the summer season in earnest, which is a time which offers us, as she noted, "a slower pace of endless days, star studded nights, that invites us to play..."

I actually will be graced with at least five or six weeks off from teaching, and will have the gift and the opportunity to read, "germinate" some volunteer and possible work endeavors, visit with family and friends, and just be. I am looking forward to this time of opening my eyes, ears, and heart - and listening and ascertaining what the next step in my life should be...

In this morning's yoga class, we contemplated the interpretation of "brahmacharya," the fourth yama, according to Nischala Joy Devi, who translates sutra II.38 in the following manner:

"Devoted to living a balanced and moderate life,
Brahmacharya,
the scope of one's life becomes boundless."

Brahmacharya is often translated as celibacy or continence, but I love Devi's interpretation, because we can all use the reminder to bring our lives into more balance and moderation. She also speaks of respecting our vital energy - replenishing it when necessary, and not over extending it as well.

Later, I read these words from Pema Chödrön, who speaks of the importance of taking care of ourselves - and not just by practicing yoga, meditation, or indulging in a massage - but by practicing compassion for ourselves and accepting ourselves unconditionally, just as we are. No easy feat, indeed!

I welcome this summer, and the many blessings it brings to me, and that will continue to unfold in the weeks to come. I am grateful for the opportunity to reflect, replenish, and step bravely into the new frontier of my life...

A Heart Skipping Beats

Sometimes a heart skips beats...

Sometimes it does it literally, and other times figuratively...

Sometimes a heart skips beats because it is overwhelmed - or it has suffered much, or it has tried to contain too much within... And sometimes, when that realization is made, a torrent of sadness and grief is released...

Sometimes a heart skips beats...

And sometimes, it happens both literally, and figuratively at the same time...

There is always a message in everything...

I think of this at the river, as undulating waves lap at my feet by the riverbank...

This is a year of so much change for so many - on so very many levels...

Sometimes, when one finds oneself transitioning from one phase of life to another - a heart may skip beats...

Yes, a heart can skip beats - both literally and figuratively when one casts aside what was and all that it entails - and finds oneself instead, on the threshold to something new, and unknown...

And only then, is skipping a beat - a good thing...

A Butterfly's Dance of Joy and Transformation

This morning, after rising early, meditating, and going for a long walk, I went down to the river. It is the last day of school in this county, and there were a lot of people and quite a flurry of activity in the park. So I walked down to the boat launch area to survey the river and to do my "river meditations" and practices, which I like to refer to as my "river ablutions."

After a while, unbeknownst to me, something perched itself on my arm. I saw it out of the corner of my eye - in my peripheral vision on my right, and I freaked. It looked like some huge spider. I tried to brush it off a couple of times, but it wouldn't leave. Finally, I brushed it off - with my car keys, which I still had in my left hand, and it flew away.

Well, I thought it flew away, then I noticed it quivering on the ground towards my left. I watched it, feeling incredibly remorseful. It was a white and black butterfly, like nothing I had seen before. It quivered, and attempted to hobble here and there, and remained motionless.

I immediately began to pray for it - and send it Reiki energy - imploring the wounded butterfly to forgive me. I felt so sorry and guilty for having brought it any pain. After a while, it attempted to fly, and hopped and came down a few times.

I continued praying and sending it Reiki and implored with God - and gave the intent for this poor little butterfly to receive as much healing energy for as long as it needed it. After some more time, I approached it, and it did get up and flew around a bit. It rested, and then continued to get up and flew around some more, each time for a longer amount of time, until it eventually flew away. I am hoping it will be okay, at least, that is what I heard inside of me.

This butterfly wanted my attention. It really wanted to hold on - and was attracted to my arm. And I of course, reacted out of fear initially. How silly. It was obviously not afraid of me!

I came home after running errands very much believing this butterfly had a message for me, so I looked up its meaning, and so many insights came my way:

Transmutation, Dance of Joy

The butterfly is the symbol of change, joy and color.
It is the symbol of the soul.

They remind us that life is a dance,
not to take things quite so seriously.
They also remind us to get up and move.
Dance brings the sweetness of life.

Butterflies bring color and joy to your life.
Look at them and remember what joy is in your life,
if its a lot or a little, it is still joy.

They teach us that growth and transformation does not have to be traumatic:
it can occur gently, sweetly, and joyfully.

If a butterfly totem has shown up in your life,
make note of the most important issues in your life,
and see what has to be changed.

I had to stop - and reflect more deeply on this sentence:

"If its a lot or a little, it is still joy..."

Another reading affirmed that butterflies are messengers for change. If it comes to us hurt or ill, it asks us to stop keeping our joy at bay. Butterfly gently requests that we allow the natural transformation of things in our lives...

Still another reading reminded me that life is short, and so it is to be valued. Again, it is a reminder of change - both internal and external - and of looking for the sweetness of life. It is also about celebrating beauty and enjoying the journey of life, and settling into the rhythm of life as well. Again, another indication of the importance of going with the flow...

Yesterday, I did a Reiki session for a friend. While I continue to do my own Reiki practices, I had not done a session in a while. Then last night, I settled down with a book a colleague recommended, titled - The Holy Spirit and the Spirit of Reiki - One Source, One Spirit: Interconnecting Theology, Science and the Practice of Reiki, by Ruth Mayeux Allen, PhD.

I found it a fascinating read, because the author's personal experiences and journey were unlike anything I have read before. I actually called on her spirit to merge with mine as I sent the butterfly some Reiki.

Last night, after an email exchange with a dear soul companion, who shared what she would like to do with her gifts and life after she becomes an empty-nester, I began to think creatively of different things that I could do - or different things I had considered at some point - such as pastoral care in a hospital, or offering Reiki to cancer patients, or blending spirituality with healing and or yoga - or maybe exploring something totally different...

I went to bed, filled with infinite possibilities, and this morning, it took a small and beautiful creature, whose life I almost destroyed to remind me of the beauty and gift of life - and the fact that God is not finished with me yet!

The Transit of Venus

I wake up, and meditate for an hour, mindful that today, in the heavens, something will be seen that will not happen again for 122 years...

They say that at the heart of this Transit of Venus, lies a mystical influence, that can enable us to connect our hearts with our minds in profound and mystical ways...

They say that this Transit, will allow for a balance of male and female energies - and that it heralds the advent of Divine Feminine and ushers in a new era...

And though it is cloudy, and I cannot see this event, I have seen it with the eyes of my soul, and have felt its energy all throughout the day...

I go to the river for further meditations, and then for a long walk, imprinting in my mind all the intentions and affirmations that will enable me to harness the powers of this day to move forward in my life...

This is a time to step into a greater flow and let go of what no longer serves, and on my walk I hear these words:

to be in
the flow--
let it go

to go
with the flow--
let it be

when you are in
the flow

what is, IS--
what isn't
ISN'T

to be in
the flow--
is to let go
of control
and what does not serve

be where you are:
let it be
in the flow

I spend a good portion of the day in quiet and silent meditation - wishing the best for everyone that I pray for, as I go about my domestic duties. May we awaken to a better way of living, working, and being...

Going With the Flow: Ruminations on Satya and Mindfulness

I took a lazy jaunt down to the river later in the morning after teaching. It was one of those breezy mornings where the cool air wafted in through open windows while we practiced and it made savasana even more delicious. It was very windy down by the river, and I observed the river's undulating waves and reflected on what it means to go with the flow.

I watched a couple get their kayak ready to put into the water, but it was not one of those days I would consider going in. You'd have to do a lot of work to get anywhere - unless you were willing to go with the flow...

When we are in the flow, we are very present, and mindful, and accepting of what is.

While I was at the river, a young man sat slouched on a bench to my side, very much absorbed with his iPhone. Not once did I see him look up at the breathtaking scenery around him. Later, I went for a walk, and another man just as absorbed with his device - practically collided into me. I wondered when he would look up to see where he was going. He was totally oblivious to my presence until he was practically upon me, and seemed stunned to see my face almost in front of his.

A couple of weeks ago, I was out with some friends I had not seen for a while, and I realized later, that I was somewhat upset, because both of them spent a lot of time texting on their phones and constantly checking their messages. I did not feel they were fully present - when I had totally prepared for our gathering and "shown up" in all the ways I possibly could. And while I tried to remind myself days later of one of the "Four Agreements" - "Don't take anything personally" - I felt my friends weren't totally mindful, or present, and they were not in the flow...

When you are in the flow, you let go of your need to control...

They say that Mother Teresa of Calcutta had a way of looking into your eyes and making you feel like you were the only one who existed. I've heard this said of so many people. Obviously, she was not into multi-tasking!

This morning, and throughout the day as I engaged in my domestic duties, I tried to be mindful, and do everything with love. I actually spent a lot of time "offline." On my walk, I thoroughly enjoyed the breeze against my skin, and the sound of the leaves rustling. I was very mindful of the everything that I saw and felt...

When you are in the flow, and mindful, you operate out of a place of integrity.

This morning, I considered the second of the yamas - "satya" as a theme in my yoga class. While satya is usually translated as truthfulness, I explained that staya also has a lot to say to us about living with integrity. And when we live from a place of integrity - we experience peace in our hearts....

When we go with the flow
we let go of control.
When we go with the flow
and let go of control--
we become more mindful.
When we are more mindful,
we are more aware of the behaviors
that pull us out of the present moment
and out of our own integrity.
And the more we live in integrity,
the more we dwell in the heart.

These were my ruminations and insights for this magnificent day...

Dancing With Animals and Life Lessons

The animals continue to speak...

Today, it was two ants demanding my attention - one crawling on me down by a river that was swift, turbulent and muddy from the recent rains. The other one followed me to the car, and then promptly hopped on to my steering wheel to follow me home...

An ant symbolizes patience, order, and discipline...

"The ant teaches you how to become the architect of your life.
The greatest success comes with persistence.
The ant shows you how to work with others.

Ask yourself it you are making things harder than they need to be.
Are you being patient with your own and others' efforts?
Using discipline, you can lay a foundation for success."

These are very interesting insights to consider, because during my drive to the river this morning, I reflected on what may be nascent opportunities for me to offer a retreat or workshop on yoga and prayer. I also thought about marketing and self-promotion - and how uncomfortable I am with all of that. And then, the ants made their entrance...

I came home and went on a walk, and encountered a robin. It was not afraid of me. I stopped to watch it for a time, and twice we locked eyes for what seemed to be an eternity. It definitely looked as if it wanted my attention:

Robins symbolize new growth:

"A robin will stimulate new growth in all areas of your life.
Believe in yourself as you move forward.
Obstacles will fall by the wayside if you do and confrontations will be for show only.
This totem gives you the ability to will new growth into your life.
Meditate on robin and the correct path will be revealed to you."

I encountered a cardinal in the very same place I found the robin, just a couple of days ago:

"Cardinals remind us there is always the opportunity to recognize
the importance of our life purpose...

It is a time to listen to the feminine side,
and the aspects of creativity and intuition..."

These are such interesting insights to ponder and contemplate at a time in my life I have considered walking away from teaching yoga altogether.

But then, I am warmed every time I teach my students... I believe they give me more than I could ever hope to offer them... I have met wonderful people because I chose to walk this path...

Yesterday, I subbed for my teacher, which I have the honor of doing every so often. It was one of those teaching moments where I felt incredibly on - teaching from my heart and my power - with gentle authority and eloquence - and the group responded beautifully with radiant and deeply beautiful poses. I worked with the theme of "ahimsa" - one of the yamas - often translated as "nonviolence" - though I chose to reflect on the notion of cultivating greater reverence in our lives. It is times like these that I feel that yoga is not finished with me. Not just yet...

Today, we begin a new month. This year is almost half over, and it has brought climactic change into many lives... I am not quite sure what the remainder of this year will be like, but as I went about my domestic duties this afternoon, I thought to myself that nothing is lost in the sight of God. It is never really about what we do - but how we do it. As Mother Teresa of Calcutta used to say - it is how much love we put in the doing...

So, it never really was about teaching yoga for me - just like it was never about teaching theology or practicing various forms of ministry all those years. It was always about being present, and mindful - and doing everything with love - and hopefully, making a difference.