Aligning with Grace

Painting is like meditation... Painting IS a meditation! I have spent the last few days painting walls, with a few more left to do... This morning, as a new basement door and storm door were being installed, I took a few mo ments to carefully inspect the painted walls and note the spots I had missed earlier this week, as I mentally reflected on my work. What I realized, as I painted, is that I am attracted to this endeavor because of its meditative qualities. It is an activity that is solitary, and one which requires both practice and concentration, if one is to become "better" at it. Earlier in the week, when I began the project of painting the upstairs hallway, I did not know if I would complete it in a day. And it did not matter. I gave myself totally and wholeheartedly to the task at hand. Later on the second day of painting, I posted this as my status on Facebook: "If you concentrate and surrender, you are in the flow and become one with the painting and...

I paint walls... I prepare my house... I make my house ready... I listen to a poem, written by Mary Oliver, which is read by the pastor presiding at Sunday's liturgy. I have not heard it before, but I soak it in... Two days later, I remember the poem and look it up. I realize I have the volume where this poem is found, and also notice it has previously appeared in publications such as America... Making the House Ready for the Lord Dear Lord, I have swept and I have washed but still nothing is as shining as it should be for you. Under the sink, for example, is an uproar of mice it is the season of their many children. What shall I do? And under the eaves and through the walls the squirrels have gnawed their ragged entrances but it is the season when they need shelter, so what shall I do? And the raccoon limps into the kitchen and opens the cupboard while the dog snores, the cat hugs the pillow; what shall I do? Beautiful is the new snow falling in the yard and ...

I was a little apprehensive this morning. I always am when I need to go to the doctor. It is not my favorite thing... I was due for a 6 month check up with my cardiologist. At our last meeting she wanted me to get all of my numbers in a target range, which I am happy to report, I either met or exceeded. But that is not why I am making this entry... When I got to the office, the nurse checking me in noted that my referral had expired. I thought it was good for 5 visits. It is - but within a certain time-frame. That, I did not know. She asked me to call my primary care physician's practice to have it faxed over. The problem is - they require a 24 to 48 hour notice. I called anyway and left my message. As the time of my appointment drew near, the nurse asked me if I had heard from my doctor's office. I shook my head negatively. So, she called. She spoke very nicely to the person at the other end whom I know to often be - shall we just say - "hard edged." The nu...

"Ad Majorem Dei Gloriam." All for the greater glory of God... This is a simple reminder to find God in all things and it was a favorite saying of St. Ignatius of Loyola whose Feast Day is today. I have a certain fondness for Ignatius. I went to a Jesuit University for grad school and my son went to a Jesuit grade school and high school. I like to think these fine institutions played a major part in his formation. Certainly he forged life long friendships within them... This summer has been filled with the mundane - many unexpected house repairs changed the expectation I had of a lazy summer of reading and some travel. Instead, I have had to stay put, and be flexible to whatever the moment offers and to whenever contractors can come do the needed work. And while I would have preferred to simply have been a contemplative all summer, Ignatius reminds me to find contemplation in action. Things rarely go the way we want or expect. Yet, to offer everything for the greater...

Sometimes depression comes into our lives for a reason... And sometimes, it stays with us for a season... But sometimes, depression takes up residence in our our hearts and souls for a very long time... And some of us struggle with depression our whole lives... I have not been able to stop thinking about Cory Monteith, the talented young actor from GLEE. He engaged in a life long struggle with drugs that began very early for him and that finally took his life. He might have struggled with depression too. I don't know. Sometimes addiction and depression go hand in hand.  I'm sure many fans of GLEE were shocked upon hearing of the death of this young man in the prime of his life. I was. I am "almost" twice his age, and while I've never struggled with a drug addiction like Cory did, I think I know a bit of what he may have felt... Often, when these tragedies occur, many do not see it coming - especially those who are its victims... A couple of years ag...

The last couple of weeks has brought its shares of challenges, blessings, and insights... I more or less had certain plans for the month which had to be abandoned as I was faced with several unplanned house repairs. In many ways, these needed repairs mirrored issues within my own soul that needed attention. A house has always been a wonderful metaphor for my soul and the work that it must do... Last week, as I left my acupuncturist, after having discussed with her some of the issues and decisions I was facing, I was greeted by a beautiful tiger swallowtail butterfly, that reminded me so much of the blue butterfly whose path mystically intersected with mine on a walk last fall.  Butterflies are symbolic of change, freedom, creativity, and joy. In ancient cultures they were also regarded as a sign of impending rebirth - of renewal or of a new beginning on a higher plane of existence. The various life cycles butterflies go through are indicative of questions we might need to ask...

Sometimes, insights and answers come from unexpected places. They will come to us if we quiet the voices within that often drown out the stillness so that we can truly listen and take heed... Welcome insights and answers can come to us in messages we receive from friends - in an email, or a call, or a Facebook post, or simply through our observation and appreciation of the wild life all around us - or the beauty in flowers and vegetation. For the last several weeks on my walks, I have been invariably visited by exuberant robins manifesting out of heavy canopies of draping branches that then proceed to "walk"  on the path, right in front of me. They gayly hop a few steps forward, then slyly wait for me to catch up to them. I follow at a safe distance, until they decide to start hopping again. Sometimes we play out this little ritual for few minutes. So finally today, I decided to look up the meaning of robins on my favorite animal totem site: "A Robin totem will s...