Meditations and Ablutions at the River

Today is a beautiful day... I can see it. Feel it. Taste it...

Yesterday, on the other hand, was a day that was raw emotionally, in every way...

As I continue to observe and become partially embroiled in the fallout and several discussion threads regarding the recent events within my yoga community, I feel myself gradually, and unexpectedly pulled back to an emotional landscape I have not inhabited for a while now - but the churning of information in the midst of multiple revelations awakens memories and tugs at the remnants of old wounds, long since healed...

And so, instead of going to my yoga class on the other side of the river, I choose instead, to get inside the river...

In the last day, so many quotations come to me bearing needed insights... It seems everything is being broken open everwhere - in my community, in the lives of my friends, and in my heart as well. I question everything, and I mean - EVERYTHING!

Inner work continues, it cannot be otherwise... There are always new layers to address, even in areas we feel are resolved...

It is such a beautiful day here on the river. Everything is in bloom, but the trees have yet to unfurl their new leaves...

And I pray, and baptize myself with the spray that occasionally flies off my paddle...

I paddle - sometimes practically in slow motion - slowing down down to the speed of the present moment. I meditate, and I float downstream, and I reflect on these words, and the insights they yield...

The first insight I had yesterday was simply this:

"If I totally let go of judgement, I will be totally free."

Ah! So incredible in its utter simplicity, yet it would take me lifetimes of practice to truly embody. And yet, it seems to me - this is the key to everything. To happiness. To peace. To freedom. And to Divine Union...

"As long as you have certain desires
about how it ought to be
you can't see how it is."
~ Ram Dass

"God's wisdom turns completely upside down
everything we thought we knew about the world..."
~ From a Lenten reflection

"Keep my eyes and my heart open
to what is Real."
~ Evelyn Underhill

"It is our BEING in the world
that is the essence of all we do.
Our DOING flows out of our BEING,
and that is why it is necessary
to learn to pause."
~ Macrina Wiederkehr

"Sacred is the pause
that brings us into stillness."
~ Macrina Wiederkehr

"Behind this world,
opens an infinite universe."
~ Rumi

"Nothing real can be threatened.
Nothing unreal exists.
Herein lies the peace of God."
~ A Course in Miracles

"Look for the answer
inside your question."

Yes, today, I float, and I pray...

For others, for myself - for a "situation" - for past wounds...

And despite it all - despite all the pain of the past, I am glad to be where I am today...

I still have lessons to learn - and things to work on. There is still so much to address in myself, in my relationships, and in the long healing journey and dance between love and forgiveness that I call life!


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