Endings and Beginnings III

I find myself contemplating endings and beginnings... For the last couple of days, my reflections have focused on this topic.

Last night, before going to bed, having finished one book, and looking for another, I picked up one I had read some time back, when its contents did not harbor the same meaning it now does. The book I took from my bookshelf is titled Sacred Threshold - Crossing the Inner Barrier to a Deeper Love, and it was written by Paula D'Arcy, who embodied and endured her own share of endings and beginnings, in a very brutal way.

I opened the book and read this quote by Ethel Person, a celebrated psychoanalyst:

"Something does not have to end well
for it to have been
one of the most valuable experiences
of a lifetime."

I had never considered that. Instead, I always sought some tidy resolution to events or endings in my own life - especially regarding relationships, as unrealistic as that may be. More often than not, things do not end well. Then it came to me, that a need for tidy resolutions, is really a way for us to remain attached to the person - or situation in question. And of course, I also reflected on Yogananda's reminder that all life is a series of events, drama or life lessons which we are presented with to experience without attachment to them.

When we become attached to others or life events, we no longer connect to the hidden power of the Divine in our lives. Paula D'Arcy created a checklist to remind herself of the many ways she might miss God's Voice in her life...

Guaranteed Ways to Miss the Hidden God:
How to Make Mistakes and Miss the Voice Within

1. LIVE your life at high speed. No exceptions. Run hard.
2. STAY scattered and distracted. The more clutter and activity the better.
3. TAKE everything personally. Never evaluate. Agree.
4. USE blame liberally It's so invigorating. I wasn't responsible, you were. Everything's your fault.
5. DON'T laugh, especially at yourself.
6. STAY tied to your past. Elevate it to greatness. Life remembering and longing. Or missing. Why do it halfway? Go for it.
7. USE the word 'because.' 'I can't change, because.' Because is so little appreciated as a solvent for responsibility. Try using because. This will work.
8. NEVER question or think for yourself. Just keep moving and accepting. (Refer to #1 and #3.)
9. CONTINUE to think of God as invisible and distant. Surely not present in this room. At this moment. Not while I'm reading a book.
10. REINFORCE the belief that your life is going to happen soon. This is not it, not yet. But one day. Maybe when I finish reading.

All of this coming from a woman who lost her husband and young child while pregnant, because of a drunken driver. In one split second - her entire life as she knew it - ended. Such wisdom coming from someone whose life ended and began several times over the course of a few decades until she herself found peace, and turned her energies towards helping others transition during times of great loss.

I thought of John Lennon who wisely noted, that life is what happens while we are making other plans. And, I also thought of the Buddhists who acknowledge that all life is suffering, and experienced as such because we cling to what is. They also know, as did both ancient and modern yogis and yoginis, that everything passes, and nothing endures in the endless stream of lifetimes...

Now my reflections take on a different hue...